


Piece by Piece

by Kairyn



Series: All Asunder [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, But Everyone Knows About Clint's Family Anyway, Caretaking, Deaf Clint Barton, Disabled Character, Enemies to Friends, Gen, Hurt Loki (Marvel), Loki (Marvel) Angst, Loki (Marvel)'s Punishments, Loki Whump, Mental Health Issues, Mind Control Aftermath & Recovery, No Sex, No Smut, Pre-Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie), Protective Avengers, Protective Clint Barton, Protective Thor (Marvel), Protectiveness, Recovery, Slow To Update, Slow recovery, Whump, Whump Aftermath
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-22
Updated: 2020-03-05
Packaged: 2020-03-09 09:56:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 26,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18914629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kairyn/pseuds/Kairyn
Summary: Clint cannot stand it any longer. What he found out haunted him until he did something about it and now he's got an Ex-God in his house that was near a vegetable and he has to find some way of dealing with that. Also he's pretty sure this is a bad idea and he might have gone insane. But what else was he supposed to do? Let the guy rot?!





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So... yeah, should I be doing this? Probably not. But I gave up resisting. I left the original one shot like it was because I shouldn't be starting new stories... but yeah, let's ignore that... and do it anyway because I'm a glutton for jumping around from thing to thing... sigh. I hope nobody minds yet another story before I finish my others.

This was stupid, Clint reminded himself. Stupid, stupid, stupid, just _so stupid_. And he should probably come up with another word for it, but he couldn't help it because he was being _stupid_. But Clint could not for the life of him shake what he had seen. Seeing Loki slumped in a wheelchair drugged out of his vegetable mind and left to wither away had been haunting him. Clint tried to not think about it and just move on. But constantly his brain kept dragging him back to that day.

What certainly didn't help was knowing that Thor was depressed because he had been told by his father that his brother didn't _want_ visitors. Which Clint was sure was just a way for the bastard to keep Thor from finding out what had happened to Loki. That his brother was left to soil himself in an empty room like a helpless infant.

Clint tried to convince himself that Loki deserved every second of it, but that rang hollow even in his own thoughts. Did Loki even _know_ what he'd done anymore? That didn't seem likely with the darkness Clint had searched ruthlessly for any sign of intelligent thought. So then there was no reason to keep him locked up. Clint would normally be the first to advocate keeping the bastard locked away, but this wasn't normal.

So, Clint had a difficult problem in front of him. What could he even do, and should he do it in the first place?

Clint hemmed and hawed for several months over it despite the feeling of urgency that was seeping into his bones. Finally, though, he just couldn't take it. Clint emptied out the office at home on the first floor that he never even used. With the help of Stark, he outfitted it with something appropriate for someone severely handicapped. Tony thought it was all for Laura's mother who had taken ill and Clint was okay with that little lie. Clint had to add an entire bathroom down beside the new bedroom since none of the ones already in the house would be large enough to make handicapped accessible.

It was around that time Laura asked what was going on, and Clint couldn't exactly lie to her. She had listened as Clint explained what he'd stumbled across and how it led him to him finding Loki left to rot with barely any thoughts left in his head. Clint had a feeling if there had been a brain monitor hooked up to the alien not much activity would have registered. It took Clint a few days to convince Laura that he was not crazy or compromised and it took hacking into SHIELD to find a security feed of Loki's room.

Clint hadn't been any more prepared for what he showed her than she had been. Because while he knew Loki was defenseless and at the mercy of SHIELD guards, he hadn't realized the full extent of it. Clint tasted bile but forced the urge to vomit down as he and Laura stumbled across even more abuse of Loki.

Laura quickly closed the laptop lid to shut off the feed of a gang of guards crowded around Loki while the sounds of crying and flesh being impacted came from the center of the circle. The feed was grainy and dark and so hard to see, but it was clear Loki wasn't fighting back. His pale limbs were quite clearly sprawled along the ground and stood out like white marble in the dimness. "... alright," Laura said after a minute. "Just get him out of there, Clint," Laura said with her eyes squeezed tight.

Clint nodded and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "I'll be back, Laura," he said before getting up and grabbing his equipment. Clint hesitated for a moment before picking up his phone. SHIELD would never let Clint just go in and take Loki from them, but Thor would not give them the option.

"Hello?" Thor asked into the phone loudly. "Friend Clint? Is this you speaking through this strange device!? I have not yet grown accustomed to such dainty technology! But the little screen that said the name 'KATNISS' had your picture on it. I do not understand how Stark has programmed this- "

"Thor! You don't have to shout, buddy. Yes, it's me. Listen... I have something I have to tell you."

"Oh?"

Clint swallowed hard. "Yeah, and you're not going to like it..."

Thor was unsettlingly quiet as Clint explained everything he had seen and discovered about the SHIELD facility. Through the phone, Clint could hear the rumble of thunder, but Thor himself said nothing. Clint was nervous but kept forging ahead with his plans of getting Loki away from SHIELD that he already had a safe place set up for him to go and he just needed help getting Loki out of that cell. He spat it all out quickly since his heart was thundering in his chest like nobody's business. "So, what d'ya say big guy? Prison break sound good to you?"

There was a moment of silence. "Verily," Thor finally said. His voice was near a growl. "I shall meet you there, and then I shall have _words_ with Fury and my Father."

Clint shivered as he swore even this far from New York he heard the sky rumble from Thor's rage. "Right. I'll send you the coordinates and meet you there in a couple hours."

"Clint."

Clint caught himself from hanging up just in time. "Uh, yeah?"

"You have my thanks."

Clint almost cringed. He didn't really want thanks. Clint hadn't exactly jumped up and rushed to get Loki out of there. He'd dilly-dallied for months trying to forget he saw anything at all. He'd _left_ the guy there even though Clint _knew_ he'd been rendered harmless. "I'll see you there," Clint said since he didn't want to accept thanks and he didn't want to argue with Thor when he was already in such a murderous mood.

Clint drove to the nearest landing strip where SHIELD kept a small plane for him to come and go with. Then flew that jet to the SHIELD base where Loki was being held in the jungles of South America. It was a remote place, and Clint had a hard time landing the jet. One, because of the dense foliage, and two, because there was a raging hurricane ripping through the area and trying really hard to bring down Clint's aircraft. After struggling with the controls and attempting two landings, Clint finally managed to get the plane down on the top of the facility.

The wind and rain were punishing, and already, alarms were going off. Clint cursed and hurried to the roof access. He should have known that Thor wouldn't wait. Clint was soaked to the bone even after the short trip from the plane to the stairwell and from what it looked like the entire facility was running on backup power. The halls were glowing with red lights and alarms blared too loudly in Clint's hearing aids.

Clint readied his bow with stunning taser arrows and made his way to the nearest stairs that would lead to the unlisted levels. He hadn't told Thor exactly where Loki was but judging by the unconscious bodies all over the place Thor was going to tear the place apart to find his brother. And it probably wouldn't even take him that long. Several guards had burns all over them (electric burns it looked like) and broken limbs from where they had been manhandled into each other and solid objects. Clint didn't envy their recovery time in the least. It was probably going to be months to years.

Nobody was conscious as Clint got to the level he'd found Loki on. He cursed aloud. He'd really been hoping for a more subtle breakout than this. Clint realized that he had probably been too optimistic. Clint put his bow and arrows away as he reached the hall with Loki's cell at the end. The thick vault-like metal door had been _torn_ off its hinges and tossed away. Clint had to crawl over it practically where it was caught catercorner in the corridor.

Clint paused as he heard crying, and he really didn't feel it was his place to go in there. But, after about five minutes, Clint knew that he had to pull them out. SHIELD would already be sending reinforcements, and they needed to get Loki treatment most likely.

Clint reluctantly stepped forward and into the small, dank room. Thor wasn't sending out bolts of electricity, which was good, but he was rocking the limp form of his brother there on the ground while sobbing something that didn't remotely sound like English.

Loki was staring at nothing in Thor's arms. He was even thinner than Clint remembered and had more bruises all over his paper-like skin. His naked body was filthy with his own waste, blood, and other things that Clint would rather not categorize. Thor rocked his brother in his arms like a child whose favorite toy was broken, and Clint winced at the far too accurate description he'd come up with. Thor had tears streaming down his face as he continued to say whatever he was repeating as he stroked back Loki's matted hair. Loki didn't seem to notice.

"Thor," Clint called softly. "We gotta get him out of here, buddy."

Thor glanced over at Clint, his eyes red around the blue and face lined deeply with distress. "He says nothing..."

"... yeah," Clint said uneasily. "I don't think he's gonna be saying anything for a long time, Thor." If ever again.

Thor's face screwed up with more pain, and Clint felt like a complete bastard. Thor looked back down at Loki in his arms and murmured something else before kissing Loki's forehead and then gently picking him up bridal style. "Hold on," Clint said as he went forward and undid the IV bag that he was sure was still feeding Loki sedatives. Those probably weren't helping anything although Clint did put a sample of the fluid in his belt in case Loki had been hooked up to it so long as to get his body dependent. Withdrawal in his state would probably kill the guy. Clint glanced over at the toppled wheelchair in the corner and decided not to take it. The thing reeked anyway, and it wasn't as if wheelchairs were difficult to come by. "Alright, let's go."

Thor nodded, and Clint led the way back out of the facility. Nobody was in their way, but Clint knew that they were fighting the clock. SHIELD knew where they were and most likely what they were doing.

Sure enough, as they got to the last level before they could reach the roof, an entire squadron led by Fury himself was standing in their way. "Barton. Thor. What do you think you're doing?" Fury asked entirely too calmly given the situation.

"We are taking my brother from this barbaric place," Thor said. "You had no right to do this to him!"

"Odin gave us that right," Fury replied.

Thor's eyes glowed, and little bits of electricity escaped to snap to the metal on his armor. Thunder rolled outside. "Believe me, I will be taking that up with him later, but you will not stop us leaving with Loki now. Whatever rights Odin gave to you, I am revoking. You have gone too far!"

"Too far?" Fury echoed. "He's a war criminal that killed hundreds."

"And now he's a vegetable," Clint couldn't help but say. "Believe me, I hate him more than anyone, but he's not a threat to anyone anymore. I don't even think he knows his own name you ripped him apart so much."

Fury glanced over at the still limp figure that Thor was cradling in his arms. "You will let us pass, Fury. Or I will cut my way through you," Thor said firmly.

Fury glanced between Thor and Clint. "Letting criminals just leave isn't the way we do things," he said.

Thor narrowed his electric eyes and shifted to put Loki in Clint's arms. Clint almost staggered under the unexpected weight but managed to recover. "Take Loki and leave, Clint. I will finish here," Thor said as he pulled his hammer from his belt.

Clint knew there was a second way to the roof, but it was on the other side of the facility. But, waiting around here didn't seem smart, so he turned and left. He heard Thor buzzing and the whirling of his hammer. "Please, try to stop us," Thor said darkly to Fury and his men.

Clint didn't wait to see what would happen and just made his way to the other roof access at the other side of the facility. Loki made a strange noise, and Clint glanced down at him. It was the first noise Loki had made at all, and it sounded almost pained. Loki was looking off to the side, and Clint realized he was looking at where Thor had been left behind. "He's going to be alright," Clint said. "Thor's no pushover." Clint had no idea if Loki even knew who Thor was, but clearly, there were enough fragments in his damaged mind for there to be some sort of connection still.

Loki settled again, and Clint hoped it was because he understood, but he didn't hold out too much hope for that. More likely he'd just forgotten it already or run out of energy. Clint had to hoof it all the way around the facility, and he could still hear crashes and shouts as Thor beat whoever was stupid enough to try and stop him to a pulp.

Clint kicked the door to the roof open and cursed as he realized the storm hadn't let up in the least. He hunched his shoulders and ran through the punishing rain to the jet, cursing the whole time as his skin stung with impact after impact and he had to blink his eyes furiously to keep water out of them.

As soon as they were in the jet, Clint laid Loki down on the medical bench and put a dry blanket around him. Loki was staring at the lights of the different monitors as Clint quickly put them on him. His vitals seemed stable, so that was definitely a plus. Clint strapped him down to the bench since he didn't seem aware enough to hold on should they hit turbulence.

Once his passenger was secure, Clint set to the task of taking off in the middle of a storm. It wasn't going to be easy, but Clint surely didn't want to wait around. Thor seemed intent on ripping the place apart, and Clint didn't want to play witness to that. Thor would catch up later, Clint was sure.

The amount of turbulence and the buffeting of the wind was enough that Clint usually wouldn't dare take off in such conditions, but he knuckled down and pulled out every trick he could think of to actually get into the air. He cursed violently as a lightning bolt almost hit them, but he managed to avoid it and headed up to try and clear the clouds since Clint couldn't see the end of the storm any other direction he looked.

The turbulence was even worse, and Clint fought the controls every inch of the way through the clouds. Had he mentioned how stupid he was? Because Clint was sure, he was the stupidest person on Earth for this.

Finally, the jet cleared the storm and Clint allowed himself a moment to recover and slow his heart rate to something more reasonable. He looked down and saw the storm still rolling down below, the clouds lighting up with electrical discharges every minute or so. Clint saw that the storm was spread at least twenty or thirty miles around the facility in any direction and whistled lowly to himself. He hadn't known that Thor could make a storm so big. Thor had only ever made localized storms of a few miles before. "Your brother really loves you, Loki," Clint said back as he started back for home.

On the flight home, Clint got several calls from various people, all of which he ignored. No doubt what happened at the facility was getting out, and everyone wanted to know what he was thinking. Clint hadn't yet figured out how he would explain what he was doing to the others, so he was doing the mature thing and ignoring the problem entirely. Laura was the only call he took, and that was just to assure her that: he'd gotten Loki, he wasn't hurt, and they'd be home soon.

Clint checked on Loki somewhere over the ocean and was glad to see that the alien had fallen asleep. Or maybe passed out. Clint couldn't tell. Clint got out some simple medical supplies and tried to clean Loki up some. He was in a disgusting state, but Clint shoved his reactions back as best he could. It wasn't as if Loki would have messed himself like this normally. Plus, this was the guard's fault for just leaving him there when he clearly had no ability to take care of himself.

Clint tossed the soiled rags into the trash and used some wet wipes to try and clean him up more, but there was only so much that could be done without an actual bathroom. Some wounds Loki had Clint made sure to clean and bandage, but not many were something that Clint could actually treat. He was covered in bruises, but that wasn't something that could be addressed by anything but time.

By the time Clint got home with Loki, it was nearly ten at night, which Clint was glad for. It meant the kids would be asleep and he didn't have to explain who the person who looked and smelled a lot like a corpse was or how he'd gotten into his state. Laura was still up, and her eyes went hard at the sight of the unconscious bone-thin man that Clint carried into the house.

"I got the bathroom ready," Laura said as she held the door to what was now going to be Loki's room open for Clint.

"Thanks, Laura. Thor'll probably be here soon, I left him to deal with Fury and SHIELD," Clint said as he took Loki into the bathroom. Though there was a handicap shower in the bathroom, Clint had also put in a tub as well, and Clint carefully lowered Loki into the lukewarm water. He would have to rebandage Loki's wounds, but Clint had only done a half-assed job the first time since he'd also been trying to keep an eye on the plane at the same time.

Clint rolled up his sleeves and with Laura's help gave Loki a proper bath, which he desperately needed. Even after washing his hair three times the mess of snarls there was just so matted by filth it wasn't coming out. Laura ended up having to cut the mess free, which revealed a festering cut underneath that would have to be treated. It was a nasty looking thing that started near the right side of the crown of Loki's head and curved down and back towards the nape of his neck. Clint wasn't sure what caused it, but now it made sense why Loki's hair had been so severely matted on that side.

Loki woke up at some point, Clint wasn't sure when. He just knew that he looked up to ask Laura something and saw distant green eyes staring down at him. "You're awake again," Clint said. He wasn't expecting a response, not really, but it was still strange that Loki just stared as if completely unaware Clint had said something. "We're just cleaning you up. I don't know if you remember me," Clint said as he scrubbed the ex-Prince's feet -the soles were filthy black they were so encrusted with dirt- with a washcloth that he should probably change out for a fresh one. "My wife Laura is behind you."

"Hi there," Laura said as she paused in her cleaning of the gash in his head to move enough that he saw her. Loki continued to stare. Laura's smile didn't falter. "Don't you worry. We'll get you all fixed up," she said as if she were talking to a child. Which, Clint realized, she sort of was. And wasn't that just the saddest thing ever.

Loki did nothing to indicated he understood and soon Clint and Laura went back to what they were doing, although Laura had decided to tell a story about Lila beating the neighborhood boys in a race at school. Clint wasn't sure if it was for his benefit or Loki's.

It ended up taking the better part of two hours to finish cleaning Loki up from his neglect and tend to all of his wounds properly. The head wound was definitely the worst as it had gotten infected and would have to be treated for that before it could heal properly.

Once Loki was properly taken care of for probably the first time in months and months, Clint carefully pulled him out of the tub and carried him to the bedroom. Laura helped get Loki into a pair of pajamas, which looked a bit ridiculous on him since he was so thin. Plus, pale orange didn't seem to be his color (although Clint was blaming that on Laura since she bought the things). "There," Clint said as he situated Loki and pulled the covers up over him. "I'll stay up and wait for Thor. I'm sure he'll want to be with you a while before going to yell at Odin." Odin's name got a reaction -if only a small one- Loki shied slightly to the side and Clint made a mental note of it to tell Thor later. Even vague associations Loki could make to his past was more than Clint had thought they'd get.

Loki's eyes roamed the room for a few moments before settling on the window. Clint looked out but saw nothing of any interest out there. It was all dark woods way off in the distance. But Clint didn't comment. Instead, he made his way to the door. "You should get some rest," Clint said. "It's late."

Loki, of course, didn't respond and kept staring out of the window as Clint turned off the light. He left the door partially opened, however, in case something happened that he needed to hurry in for. Now that he had gotten Loki out of that inhumane situation... what did he do? Clint sighed and rubbed his face. He had to admit he hadn't really thought that far in advance. Probably make it so that Loki wasn't a bag of sticks would be the best choice. Great. Had he mentioned how stupid he was lately?


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just so you know, I wasn't intending or expecting to have another chapter out so soon but I really wanted to write the conversation between Thor and Clint... so much so it distracted me from writing the next chapter of Once More with Empathy... which is much more lighthearted than this! Darn you annnnggst!

It started raining at the farm only about half an hour after Clint had put Loki to bed and about ten minutes after that Thor landed with a heavy thud in the front yard and probably making a colossal depression of mud. Clint went to the door as Thor, dripping wet and looking so very _done,_ trudged up onto the porch. Mud was splattered up half of his legs and all over the bottom of his cape, but he didn't look in the least harmed. "Is he well?" Thor asked.

Clint shrugged. "As well as he can be. I put him to bed a little while ago after giving him a bath and patching up what wounds I could," Clint said. It felt so weird to be talking about _Loki_ like this. The man who'd been pulled out of a plane mid-flight and slammed into the ground without any long term effect at all. Now Clint was giving him baths and putting him to bed because he couldn't do it himself. The juxtaposition was almost too much to comprehend, and somehow, this was Clint's life now.

Thor nodded and carefully put his hammer down inside the door of the house and undid his sopping wet cape to hang on one of the pegs right beside Lila's pink bookbag and Cooper's green jacket. Thor's cloak looked a little silly intermixed with all of the kid's stuff, but Clint just shook it off as he figured he'd be getting used to that sight in the future. Clint very much doubted that Thor wouldn't be a regular visitor as long as Loki was at the farm. However long that would be. Clint hadn't thought ahead to questions like that. "How did it go back there with Fury?" Clint asked.

Thor's face grew dark. "He lives. And knows now to not come after Loki again," Thor said. "I imagine it will take him some time to recover from going through that wall. Admittedly, I was not aware it was a load bearing wall at the time. I didn't intend to bring that section of the building down around us... but I dug him and his agents out before they were crushed when they know I could have left them. I made sure they will not forget the many debts they now owe."

Clint could only stare for a minute. "... oh," he said finally after failing to come up with anything else. Clint had to admit even despite how angry Thor had been he was a little surprised that he'd actually thrown Fury through a _load bearing wall_. "Well, it's probably a good thing you didn't kill them," Clint said. That would have just made Thor a target for SHIELD.

Thor was quiet for a moment. "Despite what Fury did... he wouldn't have been able to harm my brother at all if it weren't for my Father. And, even if it were solely Fury's fault... to leave an enemy behind to slowly die of his wounds is unnecessary and dishonorable. My mother would be disappointed if I showed such behavior. If you are going to kill someone you do it," Thor said with the confidence of someone knowing that they were right. "So, I made sure they survived... but that is what took so long. Humans can be frustratingly fragile at times. Especially their necks."

"Right," Clint said. Moments like this were when Clint was reminded that for all their differences, Thor and Loki were, in fact, raised together with the same ideals. And maybe, they weren't as total opposites as people tended to think. "You want to see Loki? Hopefully, he's asleep, but I wouldn't be surprised if he's not." Clint had no idea if the guy had any sort of regular sleep schedule or how often he even slept at all.

"I would, thank you," Thor said.

Clint nodded and gestured for Thor to follow him through the house. As they passed the dining room, Laura looked up from where she had been preparing the kids lunches for the next day. "I thought I heard something heavy land outside. Hello, Thor," she said as she came around the table.

"Lady Barton," Thor greeted with a slight bow of his head. "Thank you for opening up your home to my brother. I know it could not be easy, especially with his history with your family."

Laura shook her head slightly. "What was happening to him wasn't justice anymore, Thor. It went far beyond justice and even vengeance to something just too horrible and inhumane to tolerate."

Thor bowed his head again. "Your words mean much, thank you. I will see my brother now, if I may."

"Sure thing," Clint agreed. He led Thor to the cracked open door and pushed it further so that the light from the hall illuminated the room a bit more. There was enough ambient light coming through from the dining room where Laura was working to see that Loki was still awake and looking at whatever outside that had caught his interest. Clint wondered, entirely unwelcomely, when the last time Loki even saw the outside was before today.

Thor hesitated for a moment and then stepped into the room. There was a chair shoved in the corner, and Thor pulled it over to Loki's bedside. "Brother. I've returned," Thor said softer than Clint thought he'd ever heard his voice before. Loki's lack of reaction made Thor's face screw up, and he reached out to take hold of Loki's thin hand. "Why is his hair so short?" Thor asked.

Clint almost jumped at the question suddenly addressed to him. "There's an infected gash on his head... we had to cut his hair to get to it," Clint explained. Thor nodded and leaned heavier on the edge of the bed without letting Loki's hand go. "Can... can I do anything, Thor?" Clint asked. Clint felt awkward and would really like something to do to keep him busy.

"You have done much already, Clint," Thor said. "Thank you, but I think I will sit with my brother for a while."

Clint nodded and left the room although he left the door completely open so that Thor could continue to see. Thor was still soaked, but he didn't seem to notice. Clint sighed and went to get some towels. There was water and mud traipsed all over the floors to clean up too. Thor nodded silently when Clint delivered a stack of dry towels to him, and the Thunder God put at least a token effort into stopping the water from pooling around him. Clint wasn't sure how successful he was but left Thor to what he was doing again to go and clean the rest of the mess up.

Cleaning the floors didn't actually take that long, and Clint was anxious with too much energy from just breaking Loki out of his cell and all that entailed, so sleep really wasn't much of an option. So Clint went to sit in his living room and waited. Laura stayed up with him for a little while before Clint convinced her that she should go up to bed. It was so late, after all, and life on the farm started early.

Clint needed something to do with his hands, so he tended to his equipment even though he hadn't even fired a single arrow in the rescue. Thor had taken care of all the fighting that needed to be done mostly before Clint had gotten there. Still, it was something quiet to do, and that was ideal. Clint wanted to keep things quiet. It wouldn't wake the kids, disturb the brothers in the back room, and he would be able to stay alert in case someone came to demand answers for his sudden break out of a notorious villain (that they probably wouldn't have been told was practically lobotomized with his own freaky staff or whatever).

Was that how lobotomies worked? Clint had no idea, but he was pretty sure scrambling the brain was involved somehow, and Loki seemed _pureed_ he was so damaged. Clint made a face and directed his thoughts away from that mental image. He knew that the others would be questioning his sanity, but Clint hadn't made this choice on a whim. Clint believed what he saw with his own eyes, and he'd seen how harmless Loki was. He'd seen (okay probably not physically seen but whatever) the lack of anything in Loki's mind. Yes, Clint had wanted Loki to suffer and pay for what he did. He still did. But that Loki and this Loki were so far removed from each other Clint was still having trouble reconciling the two.

Clint would have to convince the others about it somehow, although he wasn't sure how he would go about doing that yet. Clint emptied his pockets and examined the sample of IV fluids that he'd taken from Loki's cell. He should probably see what was in the stuff. Clint had a small analysis kit in the shed that he was pretty sure he'd never even used before. SHIELD had issued it to him as standard when he became a field agent, and Clint had never really had a call to use the damn thing. It was big and heavy to lug around, and if he was going to be coming into contact with drugs, it was probably something he'd seen before. Like Cocaine or Heroine or maybe Meth. Nothing to keep a legendary superhuman god down.

The rain had at least stopped so Clint didn't have to worry about getting soaked as he went out to the shed and dug around for the kit. It took him a little while, but he did eventually find the black case shoved in the back of a shelf that was holding a bunch of random stuff that Laura had decided they were saving. One box was full of baby clothes, and Clint didn't think a third kid was in the cards.

Clint had to knock a thick layer of dust and dirt off the case and then dragged the at least forty-pound pain in the neck back into the house to set the thing up. Clint had to take a few minutes to actually read the little handbook thing and figure out where he was supposed to put the sample but he got it set up and let the machine analyze while he went back to dealing with his already perfectly maintained equipment.

After about twenty minutes, the machine's screen changed, and Clint turned to fully look at what the readouts said. He let out a low whistle at the list of different drugs in the solution. Etorphine and carfentanil were both large animal tranquilizers Clint knew. Like for elephants. And that wasn't even all the stuff in that mix. There were some basics, like morphine and valium. Clint wasn't sure how Loki wasn't dead from the stuff he was being pumped full of. Maybe it just took that much to keep an Asgardian down? Well, that certainly boded poorly for if they ever needed to put Thor under for any reason. Who kept elephant tranquilizers around anyway? Well, Tony probably had some somewhere for God knew what reason, but then he seemed to have some of everything just because he could.

Clint huffed and leaned back in his chair. He would probably have to see about getting something close to this unGodly cocktail for if Loki _was_ hooked or even if he just needed to be sedated for any reason. Good thing Clint owned a farm. He knew quite a few large animal vets that might be able to get the nonhuman use drugs.

Thor came into the room and sat down heavily on the couch opposite Clint. He let out a heavy sigh and rubbed his face with his hands. Thor kept his face buried for a few minutes before looking up at Clint. "I do not know what to do..." Thor said. "He is right there in front of me, and yet he is not there at all."

"Yeah..." And really, what else could Clint even say to that?

Thor sighed again and looked over his shoulder at where the room Loki was in was. "It is not natural for him to be this way. Loki is always so animated and intelligent and just-just always so aware of everything, and now he is like that! I know he did horrible things, but he is still my brother, and it pains me to see him in such a state!" Thor closed his eyes and took several slow breaths. "I do not even know how they could have done this to him... it seems impossible, and yet he will not respond to anything at all."

Clint looked down at his hands. "They used the scepter on him," he said. "And I don't think they cared if they caused damage when they did."

Thor opened his eyes again. "Loki's Scepter?" Clint nodded. "Why would they use such a thing on him? They clearly did not seek his obedience, or he would not be in this state. Loki would have given in before his mind fully collapsed, he values his own intellect too much to risk hurting himself in such a way."

"I think they used it to make sure he wouldn't lie or anything during interrogations," Clint said. That was what he figured that scientist had meant that Clint asked when he first discovered Loki. The old man had said they used it to get information.

"... I suppose I can understand the impulse better than most, but I cannot help but find that a poor excuse for doing this to my brother," Thor said.

The room fell silent after that, and Clint wasn't sure how to break it. There was nothing that he could say that felt even remotely appropriate.

After a long time, Clint finally scrambled together a question that he needed the answer to and would tell him for just how he would have to plan for the future. "Can anything be done to... fix him?" Clint asked. "Ya know, from Asgard? Because this is beyond us Earthlings."

Thor pursed his lips together tightly. "I do not know. I would have to summon a healer, and, to do that, I must first confront my Father about what has been done. And the lies he told my mother and me. He said Loki refused to see visitors, not that he was lying on Midgard in a cell not fit for animals, helpless to even defend himself."

"Yeah... that doesn't sound like a fun conversation," Clint muttered. "So we have no idea if he can be treated beyond the physical. If he can't... are you going to take him back up to Asgard?"

Thor hesitated. "My mother would want him there so she could tend to him... but I do not know if he would be safe. Much depends on how things go with my Father," Thor said. "If... if Loki cannot stay on Asgard, I am not certain what to do. I would not feel right burdening you with his care. And Loki will live for many centuries yet... no one person on Midgard will ever be able to tend to his needs. He will... outlive everyone... even like this..."

Clint looked away as Thor brought his hand up and hastily wiped at his face and gave a loud sniff that Clint was sure he was hoping didn't sound like he'd been about to burst into tears again. But Clint wasn't in the least fooled. Thor had just hit to the heart of the issue really. If nothing could be done for Loki, then he would live the rest of his very long life a sad shell of himself. And that, Clint, was entirely confident in saying, was a fate worse than death.


	3. Chapter 3

Thor slept on the couch in the living room with his hammer right on the floor beside him. Clint eventually went to bed himself but didn't end up getting all that much in the way of sleep. He kept waking up at every little noise that the house made or that came from outside. Clint didn't usually sleep with his hearing aid in because it was terribly distracting, but he couldn't help from being little paranoid after breaking a prisoner out of custody. Natasha was probably going to kill him. One for breaking Loki out in the first place. And two for bringing Loki within twenty miles of Laura and the kids, much less to the same house. She was more protective than even Clint was.

Because he slept so poorly, Clint gave up on even trying around five in the morning. He was still tired, but Clint's internal alarm usually woke him up around five thirty or so anyway so he saw no point in waiting in bed still awake. Clint took a quick shower and started the coffee before poking his head into Loki's room.

Loki was sleeping at least, although when Clint had checked on him before going to bed himself, the ex-God had been awake, so Clint wasn't sure how much time Loki had spent staring out of a dark window. Clint sipped his coffee as he wandered the first floor of his house restlessly. Laura got up a little later and started on breakfast. If she found it odd that Clint was clearly wearing his tactical gear in the house, she didn't comment on it.

As the sun slowly rose above the distant trees, the kids started waking up and them rushing downstairs is what woke Thor. Laura got the kids to sit down at the table while Clint handed Thor the biggest mug that he could find filled with coffee since he knew how much Thor liked the stuff. Thor murmured his thanks and took a long sip as Clint headed over to the table where his children were waiting for their breakfast.

"Hey kids, I need to talk to you about something," Clint said as Laura started putting out the plates of eggs and bacon. Lila and Cooper looked up immediately, probably expecting yet another rule they didn't quite understand, but that Clint insisted upon since he knew how the darker elements of the world worked. "I need you two to stay away from the back office." The kids didn't usually bother to go into the back office since none of their toys were kept there, but just in case it was better to get it set from the beginning that now that room was entirely off limits.

"Why's that, daddy?" Lila asked as she chewed on the end of a piece of bacon.

Clint hesitated for a moment, not entirely sure what to call Loki or how to phrase the situation in a way that would be appropriate for kids. He definitely wouldn't call Loki a friend and saying someone fried his brain was out of the question. "Um, Mr. Thor's little brother was hurt really bad, and he's going to be staying with us for a while," Clint said. He figured that was sanitized enough for kids.

"So, he's here to get better?" Cooper asked.

"... yeah," Clint said. Hopefully, Loki wouldn't be here long enough for the kids to realize that 'better' was probably going to be measured in very minor improvements. Actually, Clint really hoped they never realized the extent of Loki's condition. "So, we don't want to bother him too much, alright? Just like when you two aren't feeling good and don't want to go out to play."

The kids nodded solemnly, and Clint was sure that, at least for a while, they would do what he asked and stay away from the back room. "Speaking of Loki, someone should probably bring him something to eat," Laura said as she handed Clint a bowl of scrambled eggs and tiny slivers of bacon. 

Clint didn't miss the implication that he was the one that should do that and nodded before going to the back room. Loki was still sleeping. Clint put the bowl of egg and bacon on the side table as Thor came in behind him. "Should we be waking him?" Thor asked uneasily, eyeing the sunken quality of Loki's eyes and the dark bags there.

"He needs to eat," Clint said. "He's way too thin. And besides, it wouldn't hurt to get him on some sort of a sleep schedule rather than leaving him to just doze off whenever. By the way, I don't know if you spoke much to him last night, but he seems to at least recognize your dad's name."

"I did notice," Thor said softly. "His reaction was not encouraging..."

Clint wasn't sure how to reply to that. Loki and Odin's relationship, from what little Clint knew of it, hadn't seemed so great even before all of this. Probably better to focus on what they could actually do for the trickster. Like getting him to not look like a skeleton. "Now, Thor, there's three ways this could go down. One, Loki's able to feed himself just fine. Two, he could not be able to feed himself, but with help is alright. Or three, he could be unable to manage at all, and we'll need to put a feeding tube in him."

Thor frowned at that. "A feeding tube?"

"Yeah... it, well, delivers liquid food directly to someone's stomach so that they don't have to chew or swallow it. There are lots of reasons someone might need one, and there's no telling if Loki will. I just wanted you to be prepared in case this doesn't go well," Clint said. Clint really hoped that a feeding tube wasn't needed because he had never put one in someone before and didn't want to use Loki as a guinea pig in figuring it out.

Clint reached over and gave Loki a small shake. "Loki. Loki, I need you to wake up for me."

Loki let out a little noise that sounded remarkably like a small animal. "Brother, please rouse yourself," Thor said as he crowded closer. He looked anxious even though Clint was pretty sure Loki just didn't want to wake up, and nothing was wrong. Clint had the unpleasant realization that Thor was going to become even more overprotective than he already was after this. Clint sort of already knew that in the back of his head, but this just confirmed it.

After another little shake, Loki woke up and blinked a few times. The damaged God looked very confused. "We brought you something to eat," Clint said as he reached for the bowl of breakfast. Loki's confused expression didn't ease any as Clint held out the dish. Clint sighed and gently took hold of Loki's hand to actually put the bowl there. Loki looked down into the bowl in his lap, and his brow furrowed slightly as if he were trying to puzzle out what he was looking at.

"It is good, Brother," Thor said in a softly encouraging tone. "Lady Barton is an excellent cook. And you must be hungry..."

Loki didn't react to Thor's gentle prodding and just stared down at the mixture of egg and bacon in his bowl. Clint waited another moment to see if Loki would do anything else, but when nothing happened, he reached out to take the fork out of the bowl and stabbed a small bit of egg.

Clint had to nearly stuff the bit of fluffy yellow egg past Loki's lips. Loki didn't fight it, just appeared utterly unaware of what he was supposed to do. Clint almost sighed in relief when, after a moment, Loki seemed to realize he had food in his mouth and slowly chewed and swallowed the bit of egg. Clint repeated the process with more little bits of food, and slowly Loki seemed to get the hang of eating again. It took him less time to realize what he was supposed to do although Loki still didn't make any move to feed himself.

Clint had no idea when the last time Loki had even had food was. Probably not for a while judging by how thin he was. But as Loki started opening his mouth for the food rather than Clint needing to all but shove it past his lips, Clint allowed himself to hope that maybe he just had to relearn it. Thor shifted uneasily, and Clint figured that the Thunder God was really the better one to be doing this. Maybe Loki would respond more if it was Thor trying to get him to eat on his own.

"Here, Thor," Clint said, holding the fork out to Thor. "It looks like for now we'll have to feed him. Just go slow and don't give him too much at one time." Thor looked utterly bewildered and a little terrified but gingerly took the fork from Clint. Clint got up from his seat and gestured for Thor to take his place.

There was a pause, but then Thor sat down in the chair, pulled up to the side of the bed. Clint pretended to not notice the way Thor's lip trembled as he put a small piece of bacon and egg onto the fork and mimicked what Clint had done. What was harder to ignore was how Thor's eyes watered more and more with each passing bite he gave to his little brother.

After about ten or so small bites of food, Thor dropped his hand holding the fork and his head. Thor lifted his free hand to his face even though Clint had already seen the tears. Clint hadn't ever seen Thor cry before, and he had no idea what to do about this situation. Seeing the always strong and cheerful God of Thunder crying was almost painful all on its own.

Clint reached over and put a hand to Thor's shoulder. "At least he's eating," he said in an attempt to be optimistic. "He might still get better and be able to feed himself."

Thor shook his head and wiped his face before looking up. "This is not right," he said. "He should not be like this."

"I know, buddy," Clint said, rubbing Thor's upper shoulder. He really was trying his best to comfort the larger man, but he didn't think it was really working all that well. "I know. How about I take over again, and you get some air?"

Thor nodded and got up from the chair. Clint watched him leave and then sighed. If this only had hurt Loki, Clint might not have cared so much but seeing the ex-Prince rendered so damaged was now affecting Thor rather than Loki. There wasn't much more that could be done to Loki, Thor was altogether another story. Clint sat back down and picked up the fork that Thor had dropped. Thor might not be able to bring himself to feed his brother right now, but Loki still needed to eat.

Loki was slow to eat even the soft eggs so by the time Clint had finished feeding him the whole bowl, the last bits of warmth had faded, not that Loki seemed to have noticed. Drinking from a glass seemed to be harder for Loki, but Clint managed to get a good amount of it into the damaged ex-God after some spillage and fumbling. 

Clint could hear the kids playing outside in the yard by the time he was putting the half-empty glass to the side to mop up what liquid had spilled. Loki seemed to hear it too as he turned to look at the window. "Those are my kids," Clint said. "Don't worry, they won't bother you."

Loki just continued to stare, and Clint figured that was about as much reaction as he was going to get out of Loki. Clint took the dishes back out to the kitchen where Laura was already mostly done cleaning up. Laura looked up as Clint put the bowl and fork in the sink. "Considering how Thor left the house looking like someone ran over his dog... I'm going to guess it didn't go well?"

"He ate it all," Clint said as positively as he could. "But we're going to have to feed him, at least for now."

"That's unfortunate," Laura said. "No wonder Thor looked so upset."

"I'm just glad I don't have to try and put a feeding tube in him," Clint said. "That's a little beyond the first aid that I know and if I screwed it up on Loki... well, I wouldn't want to see Thor's reaction."

Laura made a bit of a face but nodded. "From the things I've seen and heard about him, that probably wouldn't end well. I think that was part of why he left. Thor did say he would be back soon but that he needed to be 'in solitude for the moment,'" Laura said, sinking her voice deeper in imitation of Thor's speech. "How long is Loki going to be here, by the way?" she asked as she washed the bowl.

Clint shook his head. "Not sure. Sort of depends on what happens when Thor goes back home to confront his dad."

"It's hard to believe that their father could condone something like this," Laura said.

"I just know that there's bad history there," Clint said. "And I've never met Thor's old man, so I have no idea how likely it is. I certainly couldn't do something like that, but maybe Odin's different." Just the thought of someone treating Lila or Cooper the way Loki had been made Clint feel ill, and he didn't dwell on it long due to how reprehensible it was. Clint couldn't imagine willingly allowing it to happen.

Clint took the now clean bowl that Laura handed him and dried it off with a nearby towel. "I don't know how long Thor's going to stay here before going back up to Asgard... I kind of think he wants to make sure Loki really is stable before leaving."

"I think he is," Laura said. "You said he ate everything, right?"

"Yeah," Clint agreed. "He was really slow at eating, but he managed it. If in half an hour it's still all down I think we'll be pretty good on that part."

"That would be nice. He's way too thin," Laura said. "I could count his ribs last night."

Clint nodded. "Hopefully he's not like Thor and needs to eat five metric tons of food every day," he muttered. He felt he was only slightly exaggerating the amount of food that Thor could consume. "Because I don't think he can eat fast enough for that right now."

"We can always build up to more if we need to," Laura reasoned. "Plus I'm sure we can slip some extra calories into his meals if it comes to that. I'm sort of hoping he won't be here that long."

"Me too," Clint said.

There was a loud thud from outside, and Clint went to the front of the house to see Thor already coming closer. When Thor came in, his clothes looked damp and muddy again, and Clint didn't doubt he'd been off in the mountains causing some sort of massive localized storm. "You alright there, big guy?" Clint asked as Thor came into the house.

Thor nodded. "My apologies for leaving," Thor said in a rough voice. "It is simply... difficult, seeing my brother in such a state."

"I get it," Clint assured him. "I think he's still awake if you wanna sit with him a while."

"That would be wise. I have decided to return to Asgard and see what can be done for him," Thor said. "I will be leaving tonight."

Clint couldn't say he was too surprised. The longer they just left Loki like he was, the less likely they'd be able to do much about his state. At least that was Clint's assumption. Either way, delaying certainly wouldn't help anything. "How long will you be gone?" Clint asked.

"I am not sure," Thor said. "Hopefully not more than a few days but it does depend on how difficult my fa... the king will be."

Clint felt his eyebrow go up at the deliberate change of title but thought better than to say anything out loud about it. Thor must have done some soul searching while he was out there being a force of nature and Clint wasn't shocked that some things had changed. It must be hard to associate with someone who had so severely hurt your baby brother or at least allowed it to happen. "Well, spend time with him for a while. I'll bring in some lunch in a few hours. And don't worry... he'll be safe here while you're gone." Thor nodded and walked past to go and see Loki.

A tension headache was starting to form, and Clint took a few deep breaths to try and release some anxiety. Clint hoped that Thor's trip up to Asgard was quick because he was really dreading when the other members of their team decided to investigate what was going on. Thor's help dealing with that was something Clint was really counting on. Hopefully, the others would hold off for a little while.


	4. Chapter 4

Before Thor left for Asgard, Clint hurried into town to get some additional supplies. The vet wasn't exactly prepared for a Master Assassin so Clint was able to steal a few vials of large animal tranquilizers with relatively no fuss whatsoever. Clint also made a stop to pick up some better pajamas because while he loved Laura to death... pale orange pajamas were not a good look on many people, Loki included. There were a few other things that Clint grabbed as well that he thought might help with the situation before heading back home. He also ordered up a wheelchair although that would probably take a few days to come in from a bigger city.

When Clint returned, he wasn't surprised to find Thor sitting with Loki again. Thor was talking in that language that Clint assumed was Asgardian or Old Norse or something with one of Loki's hands between his own. Loki was staring at the cover across his lap as Thor spoke and Clint gently knocked on the frame to get Thor's attention. "How's it going in here?"

Thor glanced up briefly but then shook his head. "I am not certain he understands me at all. He doesn't react to anything but the King's actual name. Not his titles or even 'Father' bring any reaction," Thor said.

"Is that a bad thing?" Clint asked as he went to put the new clothes in the dresser.

"Not necessarily," Thor said. Something about the Thunder God's tone made Clint look back over his shoulder. "... but he also does not respond to Mother's name or titles. Not even a little."

Clint cringed and arranged the folded clothes for another moment. "That's... that's rough," he finally said. He had nothing else he could say and that felt inadequate.

"They have always been close," Thor said as he lowered his head. "When we were younger. Me and my friends... we used to tease him for being so attached to Mother. We shouldn't have but-"

"But you were kids and kids do things like that," Clint said. Kids were generally terrible to one another. Thor didn't have to explain that sort of thing. Kids picking on one another seemed to be a pretty universal phenomena. Not to say that it still didn't suck but Loki was hardly the first kid to be bullied for being a mama's boy, if that was essentially what it boiled down to.

Thor looked over at Clint. "I still feel bad for it. Mother was the only one who ever seemed to understand Loki and we only ever tried to get him to stop confiding in her. And now... now he doesn't even seem to remember her," Thor said as he watched Loki's attention slowly drift across the room towards the window. "This will crush her."

"He might still get better," Clint said as he closed the drawer. "Especially if you can get some of those fancy healers of yours down here to fix him up."

"If the King allows it," Thor said bitterly.

Clint frowned. "Do you really think he did this to Loki on purpose? Or knew this would happen somehow?"

Thor was silent for several minutes before sighing. "I don't know," he said. Clint winced at how broken Thor sounded when he said that. "Both my Father and Heimdall should have been able to see and put a stop to this long before Loki was rent apart in such a way. That they didn't is... I cannot think of any excuse that would be acceptable."

"Is your Dad going to be mad at you for helping me get him out?" Clint asked.

"I do not care," Thor said. 

Clint nodded a little and gave Thor a pat on his shoulder. "He's safe now, at least," Clint said in an effort to be encouraging.

"How can I ever trust him again?" Thor asked before rubbing his face. "If he can let this happen to his own son... what else is he able to do? To rationalize away? I don't think I can bring Loki to Asgard and trust he will be safe so near a man that condoned this... but to keep Mother away as well seems too cruel to the both of them. I do not know what to do..."

_Shit_. What was Clint supposed to say? How do you respond to that in any meaningful way? Thor pressed the knuckles of his fist to his mouth as he stared at Loki's pale hand.

After several minutes of thought, Clint sighed. "I think you should wait to decide things like that until after you talk with your mom and dad."

"Perhaps you're right," Thor murmured. After a minute, Thor leaned over and murmured something to Loki. The damaged ex-God didn't react to whatever Thor told him or to the kiss that Thor put on his forehead. "I will be back, Brother, and soon. Until then, Clint shall look after you. You will be safe here, I promise."

Loki watched as Thor left. Clint felt awkward and made his way out of the room after Thor. Clint swore that he heard Loki make some sort of a noise but it was too faint, and when Clint glanced back Loki was just staring again. His thousand yard gaze was very uncomfortable to try and meet. Clint looked away again.

"So, you're heading out to Asgard?" Laura asked as Thor wrapped his cape around his shoulders.

"Yes," Thor agreed. "I feel if I delay in confronting Odin I will only get more upset. And besides that, my Brother needs to see healers sooner opposed to later and that cannot happen until after I have returned to Asgard."

"Makes sense," Clint said. Clint had to admit he was a little apprehensive but he was pretty sure he would be no matter how this situation played out. Either, yes, this is exactly what Odin had planned or known would happen and _Holy Shit_. Or, no, things got out of hand and Odin just hadn't been able to stop it somehow, and _What The Actual Fuck_? Neither of those options were good.

Clint followed Thor out to the front yard. The grass and ground had been pushed and ripped up from Thor's landings and take offs over the last few days to the point Clint knew he'd need to dedicate a day or two to fixing the damage. Maybe he should invest in a landing pad if Thor coming and going to visit Loki was his reality for any length of time.

"I will try to be as quick as I can," Thor said as he unhooked Mjolnir from his belt. "Again, you have my thanks."

"Yeah, don't mention it," Clint said.

Thor glanced at the house one last time and then seemed to straighten his shoulders. "Heimdall! The Bifrost!" he shouted to the sky.

There was a moment's pause and then rainbow light slammed into the ground, searing ancient runes into the rippled grass of Clint's yard as well. Clint stepped out from under the porch and looked up even though he knew that there wouldn't be any sign of the huge beam now that Thor was gone. "Good luck," Clint muttered.

"Clint!"

Clint whipped around at Laura's call and hurried into the house. Instinct had him darting to the backroom where Loki was. Had Loki really somehow just been faking until his brother left? Clint's heart was in his throat as he ran in.

Clint was shocked to see Loki curled up and pressing his hands over his ears so hard his nails were digging into his scalp, including the infected head wound on the left side. Clint cursed aloud and jumped onto the bed to pull Loki's hands away. Loki whined and his fingers dug in harder, drawing several streams of blood with seemingly far too much ease. "Loki! Let go! You're hurting yourself!"

Loki squirmed and thrashed as Clint tried to pull the God's hands away uselessly. Loki might be weakened and not have memories or whatever but he was still stronger than a human. Clint didn't give up and after several long minutes of fighting, managed to pull Loki's hands down. "Easy, Loki. It's alright."

Loki whined and squirmed some more. "What happened?" Clint asked as he kept Loki's hands down.

"I was just checking on him and then the Bifrost went off... then he did that," Laura said.

Clint frowned as slowly Loki settled again. "I guess... maybe it was too loud for him?" Clint suggested. If they had just left him in that dark cell ninety percent of the time or whatever, then maybe Loki had gotten used to processing much less sensory information. "Or it surprised him?" That would be a better option, although Loki's reaction was extreme if he was just surprised.

"We should cut his nails," Laura said as she eyed the blood on Loki's fingers and hands. "So he can't hurt himself again."

Clint nodded and realized something else. "I'll take him and get him cleaned up. Can you... change the sheets, Laura?" Clint felt awkward bringing something like that up but it needed to be done. Clint should have realized this would be a recurring issue.

"Oh, yes, of course," Laura said.

With some manhandling, Clint was able to get Loki out of bed and into the bathroom. Loki didn't struggle or do more than just be mostly dead weight as Clint got him undressed and into the tub to wash off. Laura stripped the bed to change the sheets while Clint cleaned and treated the wounds in Loki's scalp before trimming his nails down so that Loki couldn't continue to hurt himself.

Loki stared at his hands after Clint cut his nails down. "They were pretty long anyway," Clint said as he rinsed some soap off of Loki's back. "But cutting them down will stop you from hurting yourself," Clint explained. Loki just kept staring at his hands under the water as if he'd never seen them before.

Once Loki was cleaned up again, Clint dried him off with a nearby towel and got him into some of the new clothes he'd bought that day. Getting Loki dressed was a little bit of a struggle as Clint was shorter than Loki and the ex-God was not giving much help. Laura had changed the bedding and helped Clint get Loki settled again under the fresh sheets and covers. 

Laura started the laundry as Clint watched Loki sit there blankly. Clint had no idea what to do in this situation. Clearly, Loki had some sort of thought in his head if he was able to react to things and his attention could be caught, but there was so little that he did actually react to that Clint wasn't sure how helpful any of those realizations were. "Do you think that we should put a television or something in there with him?" Laura asked as she came to the door behind Clint. "I feel bad leaving him in there with nothing to do."

"I'm not sure if he'd watch it..."

"Couldn't hurt to try," Laura pointed out.

"True. I think I've still got that old one in the garage," Clint said.

"You mean the one I told you to take to Goodwill five times already?" Laura asked with amusement.

Clint shifted. "See, you keep saying that but if I had actually done that we would not now have a spare television to put in Loki's room. If was meant to be," Clint said.

"It was you being lazy and it working out," Laura countered although she was smiling. 

"That's hurtful, babe. Very hurtful," Clint said.

Laura hummed in agreement and kissed Clint's cheek. "Well, you can be hurt while you move it, alright? I'm going to see about lunch. It's getting close to that time and it doesn't look like Loki should be missing too many meals." Clint nodded and watched for a long moment as Loki stared at nothing. He wasn't sure if a TV would help or be of any interest to Loki but at least there was a chance that Loki would have something to keep him occupied that would be somewhat stimulating. Just him sitting there staring at the wall was just too sad.


	5. Chapter 5

Thor had been gone for two days, and Clint couldn't help but be nervous. Everything at the farm had been quiet, but the archer knew that wasn't likely to last. Shield knew perfectly well where Clint was, and it wasn't as if he had the ability to hide the fact that Loki was there in the house. The plane had probably been tracked to Clint's most used airstrip, and he'd taken Loki straight back to the farm, making everything pretty dang obvious. But nothing had happened yet.

Loki hadn't improved, but he hadn't gotten much worse either. He still had to be fed although Clint had been trying to reteach Loki how to do it himself with minimal success. Loki would now at least hold the fork or spoon, but he'd also hold on to pretty much anything that he was given, so Clint didn't think that was very impressive.

The television had been moved into Loki's room, but it was unclear if he was actually watching it or not. Loki had a habit of stopping to stare at pretty much anything for hours on end. The television, the window, the wall, his hands, and even the ceiling. Clint left the tv on to something innocuous anyway just in case Loki did end up drawn into a show or movie.

Together Clint and Laura were working on getting Loki onto something resembling a schedule. The efforts seemed to help. Loki didn't mess himself nearly as often if he was taken into the bathroom every few hours. Clint again found himself wondering just how much remained in Loki's brain. The ex-God seemed able to hold it for a little while, or at the very least he remembered what a bathroom was used for since every time he was taken in and put on the toilet he would always relieve himself. But now that Loki was nonverbal he couldn't say when he needed to go, and it was up to Clint and Laura to give him the opportunity.

The only significant plus to Loki's state was he didn't seem to be a picky eater in the least. Whatever they fed him seemed fine by him. Clint had no idea if Loki had ever been a picky eater, but it would have made caring for him exceedingly more difficult if he spat out the food they gave him. He even ate the cottage cheese and fruit snack thing that Clint honestly couldn't stand, but Laura insisted was good.

On the third day since Thor left to go to Asgard, Clint spotted a familiar spec soaring through the sky. He sighed and grabbed his bow even though it wouldn't do much unless Tony lifted his faceplate. Luckily Tony was prone to doing that at times when he probably shouldn't so maybe Clint would get a shot then if it came to that. He really didn't _want_ to shoot an arrow at Tony's face -even if the man sometimes really needed one- but Clint had promised Thor to keep Loki safe until he got back.

Clint stepped down off of the porch just as Tony was landing. There was a moment of silent tension. After that stretched on long past comfortable, Tony finally let his faceplate flip up. "Well, your eyes aren't Brain-Wash Blue, so that's a good sign," Tony said. "What's up, Clint?"

"Nothing, man," Clint said. He didn't imagine there was any possible way Tony didn't come here already knowing Clint had broken out Loki -especially with that opening line. "Just... taking a break. Where's Nat and Cap?" Because there was no way that those two would not be informed and checking on this situation.

"Well, you know how slow that jet is," Tony said airily. "They'll probably wander in at some point."

Clint nodded but scanned the surrounding tree line for any sign of bright red, white, or blue. Nat, he didn't think he'd spot too easily, but Cap wasn't what one would call 'discrete,' although he was definitely better than Tony with his race car paint job. "So... Fury called."

"I thought he might," Clint said. "What'd he tell you?"

"That you and Thor were harboring Loki," Tony said. "Gotta say... didn't sound like you but when you didn't answer any of our calls we started to think maybe the Angry Pirate was telling the truth somehow."

Clint wasn't surprised, but he still hadn't thought of how to fully explain what was going on. Would they believe him if he said Loki's brain damage left the ex-God practically helpless? That wasn't even something that Clint had fully believed at first, and he'd seen it. "Did he also tell you that Loki was being beaten and starved?"

Tony frowned but then wiped the expression off his face. He almost had his exterior schooled enough so that Clint might have thought Tony was over that bit of knowledge except for the conflicted emotion in his eyes. "He was a prisoner of SHIELD, right? I wouldn't expect them to be nice to Loki of all people."

"I wouldn't either," Clint agreed. Clint didn't have any illusions about the people he worked for. They tried to be a force of good, but that didn't mean they were always morally and ethically right in that pursuit. "And I probably wouldn't even care if not for the fact they essentially fried his brain beforehand."

"I'm sorry they what?" Tony asked, eyes going wide.

"Yeah," Clint said with a cringe. Even thinking about the reality was uncomfortable. "Figured Fury wouldn't mention that bit... Look, he can't do anything by himself at this point. Can't feed himself, can't get out of bed, can't speak. He doesn't even remember what he did. Beating him and keeping him in a little concrete room now is... pointless."

"How do you know he isn't just acting?" Tony asked.

"Because Loki's way too proud to do this just to fool us. The guy can't even take himself to the bathroom anymore, does that sound like something Mr. Made-to-be-Ruled would do even to get out of punishment," Clint said.

Tony was silent for a moment. "Are you positive?" he asked although he seemed unsure of the question. "I mean, Thor said his brother had dedication when it came to his pranks and shit."

"The guy was in my head. Pretty sure I know him well enough to say making himself look weak doesn't seem like the way he'd get out of punishment," Clint said. "I feel like he'd do anything possible to look as strong as he could at all times."

"... yeah. I suppose I can see that," Tony said.

Clint ran his thumb back and forth along his arrow as he watched Tony process the information he'd been given. Clint was pretty sure that Tony would be on Loki's side in this given his own history with imprisonment and torture. But there was a whole shift of perspective that had to happen, and Clint knew that wasn't easy. He'd struggled with it for several months himself.

Before either of them could say anything else, there was a loud crack of a gunshot. Clint processed it immediately as having come from behind him. The house. Clint barely noticed Tony curse as he ran back into the house and through the living room to the back where Loki's room was. Half a second told him exactly where the gunshot had come from. "Nat!"

Natasha had pinned an unresistant Loki to the bed and had one pistol pressed right against Loki's temple. Her arm was pressed against his throat, and her Widow Bites looked armed. A hole in the pillow beside Loki's head was blackened by powder burns, telling what she had shot a moment ago. "Stay there, Clint," Natasha ordered without looking up. "I have this handled."

"No, there are things you don't know," Clint said. A quick glance told Clint that Natasha had come in through the window and Tony had followed him in. Cap, fully decked out with shield and everything, showed up a moment later, and Clint would question where he was hiding later -when Natasha wasn't about to shoot Loki in the head. "Nat. Think about this for a second, you'd never be able to get that close to him if this was mind control or hostage situation or anything like that. He's harmless."

"He attacked an entire city and turned you against us," Natasha pointed out, still not looking away from Loki who hadn't moved.

"I know. But that Loki isn't this Loki. You think I'd bring him here around _Laura,_ around my _kids_ if I wasn't damn sure he wasn't a threat?" Clint asked. "You know me better than that, Nat."

"I don't know what you would do if you were mind-controlled," Natasha said.

Clint was frustrated at this point and getting worried that Natasha would lose her patience and just fire. "Then give me a goddamn concussion and prove I'm not," Clint snapped. "He's not even fighting you off, Nat! Does that seem like Loki to you?"

Finally, Natasha glanced up at Clint. There was an awkward pause. Steve cleared his throat. "Maybe we should listen to him, Natasha," he said. "We only have Fury's version of what happened. And this doesn't seem to be adding up."

The tension grew each second Natasha just studied Clint. Slowly, her posture relaxed a little and shifted her finger off the trigger, although she didn't move it from Loki's head. "Alright. What happened then?" she asked. Natasha didn't sound happy, but Clint was glad she was even giving him a chance to explain the situation before immediately falling back to murder. Showed a whole lot of progress. He was proud of her.

"They used the scepter on him," Clint said. "Not sure what for... something about getting information, they said. But they didn't really know how to use it like Loki did. So... it just sort of ripped stuff out and now he's all... like this. When I found out they had him here on Earth, I went to go confront him. Found him like this and well, seems like he can't really pay much more than he already has."

"He could be executed," Natasha said.

Clint saw Steve shift out of the corner of his eye. "True..." Clint said carefully. This was still a tenuous situation and Clint wanted to be sure to not trigger anything disastrous. "But what would that do at this point? It's not like he'd know what he'd be getting executed for. And, I don't really want to get Thor mad enough to make another typhoon."

"Hurricane," Tony said.

Clint glanced to the side. "What?"

"Typhoons are only in the Pacific. Hurricanes are Atlantic Ocean," Tony said.

"Whatever large tropical storm craziness that Thor summoned when he found out about Loki, Tony. Is the name really important?" Clint asked. Tony shrugged. Clint sighed and looked back at Natasha. "Come on, Nat. Trust me on this."

"... and if it turns out he is faking it?" Natasha asked after a moment.

"Then you can say how you told me so for the rest of my life," Clint said instantly. He knew that would never happen, but he could understand how Natasha wasn't able to just believe that.

Natasha sighed and got up from the bed, holstering her pistol and de-powering her Widow Bites. Clint moved forward and frowned at the burn mark where the hot metal of Nat's gun had pressed against Loki's temple. "Why did you shoot anyway?" Clint asked as he grabbed the ruined pillow to toss to the side. There was a hole into the mattress underneath but Clint wasn't concerned that it would get in the way. "I know he wasn't resisting."

Natasha shifted her weight and looked somewhat sheepish to Clint (although it was still hard to see any tells in her body language). "I thought he was just being difficult not answering me so I wanted to show I was serious," she said. Clint felt his eyebrow go up. "I thought he was mind controlling you again."

Clint could probably point out three of four tells to Loki's condition just in the room but figured that wouldn't help anything. "Uh huh, well, you should probably go apologize to Laura for firing a gun in the house. You know how she feels about that."

Natasha made a face. "... yeah."

"And where were you, Cap?" Clint asked as he shifted Loki into a less contorted position. Clint was overly aware the others watching him but what was he supposed to do? Just leave the guy all twisted with a burn on his temple?

"Um, upstairs," Steve said. "We weren't sure where Loki was holed up in the house."

"Well, now you know. I'll be out in a minute," Clint said as he continued to manhandle Loki. The others didn't actually leave and Clint was fighting against feelings of self-consciousness. This was just such an awkward situation. Clint tried to not rush as he checked over Loki's previous head wound and put burn ointment to the round gun mark. When he finished that he closed the window that Natasha had climbed through and made sure to lock it this time.

As Clint left Loki's room the others followed him finally away from the door. "Okay, so, Bambi is pretty, um, different," Tony said. "I guess I can see why you'd be so sure he wasn't faking after all that."

"You said SHIELD did this to him?" Steve asked as he pulled off his cowl and ran a hand through his flattened hair.

Clint nodded. "I'm pretty sure it wasn't intentional on their part, but I don't think they cared much either," Clint said.

Laura came downstairs with a frown on her face. "Natasha, did you fire that gun earlier?" she demanded. Natasha shifted uncomfortable, but then nodded. Laura looked very unimpressed. "If my children can restrain themselves from rough-housing in here I think it's not too much to ask that you do it as well," she said.

"She shot a pillow," Clint volunteered. Natasha shot him a glare. "Well you did. She'd find out when she went to change the pillow covers there was one less than before."

"Nat! That's the fifth one!"

"I'm sorry but it was important," Natasha said.

Laura sighed. "Honestly, sometimes I wonder why I love you spies so much," she said. "But, we can talk about the pillow murdering later. Right now, I think maybe some drinks?"

"Great idea," Tony agreed. In just a few motions he was climbing out of his Iron Man suit and leaving it standing in a nearby corner, probably still on standby mode. "I really need one after what I saw."

"And you didn't even see him when he got here," Laura said. "He was even worse then. At least now he's clean and in clothes. Everyone in the living room. I'll bring out something in a minute."

Everyone knew better than to argue with Laura, so in just a few minutes, the Avengers that were in the house were sitting in the living room while the kids were shooed outside to play. They didn't need to hear anything like what was about to be discussed. "Where's Bruce, by the way?" Clint asked.

"We thought it was probably better to not bring Hulk around where your kids and wife were," Steve said. "He does tend to cause a lot of collateral damages, and we had no idea what Loki was up to or what leverage he might have."

"Well, thanks for that," Clint said.

"And Thor?" Natasha asked as Laura handed out some beers.

"Up in Asgard having, what I would imagine is, a very uncomfortable talk with his parents," Clint said with a gesture towards the clouds. "Odin is the one that sent Loki to SHIELD in the first place so... Thor's got some bones to pick."

"Sounds like a super great time," Tony said. "Pity we're missing it."

Steve frowned. "Tony, I don't think now's the right time for sarcasm."

"So, who's being sarcastic?" Tony asked. "I'm pretty sure that would be quite a sight to see. Thor and Odin going at it. I mean, I know I only talked to Loki for like... five minutes in the penthouse before I pissed him off enough to throw me out a window, but that in there? That's creepy. It doesn't seem right," Tony said pointing with his beer-wielding hand to the back room Loki was in.

"It is," Clint agreed. He remembered all too vividly the blank look on Loki's face as he just let Clint dig the point of the scepter into his throat.

"He reminds me of some of the people I saw during the war," Steve murmured so low that Clint's hearing aides almost didn't pick the words out. There was an awkward silence after that where nobody knew what to say. Steve didn't often talk about the war other than in the vaguest terms of something that had happened and he'd been in. He certainly had never alluded to the horrible things that humans had been put through before. "Fury didn't say anything about Loki's condition when he sent us here."

Clint nodded. "I figured he hadn't."

"But now we know," Steve said. "I think you should tell us exactly what has been happening, Clint. Everything you know." So, Clint did.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unedited atm so please excuse the flagrant disregard for proper comma usage. I'll go back at some point and fix it...

"We should probably have him looked at," Tony said as his thumbs flew across his phone. He'd been doing something on the device for the past ten or so minutes. Something about if he'd known the stuff Clint wanted was for someone brain damaged instead of old he would have picked out different things. Clint wasn't sure what he could possibly be buying now but thought against asking. No doubt he'd find out soon enough.

Steve nodded in agreement instantly. "Yeah, if he's really as bad as he seems I'm sure that he could use some actual medical help."

Clint leaned back in his chair. They were right, of course, all that he knew about Loki's actual condition was just what he'd observed. Most things were pretty obvious at a glance. The thinness, lack of speech, and loss of body control for instance. "Yeah, all well and good but I can't just waltz him into a hospital or anything. And Bruce isn't actually a doctor. Thor said he'd try to bring a doctor or healer or whatever they call them from Asgard. I just don't know how long he's going to be."

"Bruce might not be an actual doctor but he knows more about actual medical things than anyone here," Tony pointed out. "And if Thor's already looking for one up in Asgard he only needs to do some preliminary stuff anyhow, right?"

Natasha nodded. "He just has to keep Loki from getting worse and Bruce is more than capable of doing that and maybe some basic diagnostic work. His work in poverty stricken areas in clinics means he's seen a lot." Clint nodded. That made sense and to be honest Clint would be happy for any sort of help figuring out just how badly SHIELD had fucked Loki's brain. "Also... it might not be a bad idea to see if we can find any records of what they did to him."

"Yeah, I can take that one," Tony said instantly. "In fact, I kinda already am..." he added in a little sing-songy voice.

Clint rolled his eyes but couldn't help the amusement. Of course Tony was already hacking SHIELD, he took every chance he could get to do that. "I thought you were buying things for Loki," Steve said with a slight frown.

"It's call multitasking, Cap. And I've been doing it since I was five," Tony responded without looking up from his phone even once. "Pretty damn good at it by now."

Steve sighed but didn't argue. "Nat, could you call in Bruce? He should still be on standby at the jet."

"I thought you didn't bring him," Clint said.

"We didn't bring him to the farm," Natasha said as she lifted a hand to her ear. "But if Loki tried to flee we wanted him nearby."

"We had to put the jet down pretty far from here to make sure that you didn't see us coming," Steve said. Clint nodded in understanding. That made sense and Natasha probably knew about dozens of places in the woods she could hide a jet landing.

"Bruce? Yeah, things aren't quite like what Fury told us. No, no Loki's here, he's just... different. Come to the farm and see. Oh, and bring any medical stuff you might have in the jet. No, Clint, Laura, and the kids are fine. Yeah, it's actually Loki that might need it. Uh huh. See you soon," Natasha said before dropping her hand. Clint noticed she hadn't fully relaxed but considering this was Natasha, he wasn't really expecting her to do that for a long while yet.

Bruce came trudging up to the house after about fifteen minutes with a bag in his hand and a confused look on his face. "Can you all explain what's going on? Because I was not expecting to need this for Loki of all people," Bruce said as he put his bag down.

Between all of them it didn't take too long to explain what they knew about what had happened, partially because they still didn't know a lot of what happened. Other than the involvement of the scepter having damaged Loki's mind.

Clint led Bruce into Loki's room and answered what few questions that he could. Loki didn't seem to notice or care when Bruce gave him a quick examination. Bruce's frown kept growing deeper as he checked everything from Loki's reflexes to the gash on his skull which was now starting to heal under Clint and Laura's care.

When Bruce was done he sighed and stepped out with Clint to talk to the others. Laura was putting out another round of drinks as well as some sandwiches while Tony kept working on his phone and Steve and Natasha talked lowly back and forth. Steve noticed them coming back into the living room, "Well, Bruce?"

Bruce sighed and sat down beside Steve on the couch. "Well, the head wound isn't looking too bad. And he's still got reflexes so that's good," he said. "Clint says he's eating even if it's slow so hopefully the weight issue is being taken care of. I'm not a specialist in brain injuries, though, so I can't fully evaluate him from that standpoint."

"Well, I still feel better for you looking at him," Steve said.

"SHIELD's really upped their game," Tony said. "But I think I'm just about through their firewalls and passwords. I can't say these files are definitely about Loki but considering how many walls it's all behind I think it's a pretty good chance."

"Are we sure that having Loki here at the farm is the best place?" Natasha asked. "Even if he's not acting... what if SHIELD decides to send a retrieval team here to get him back? Laura and the kids could get caught up in it."

"Don't you worry about us," Laura said. "We have plans for if something like that happens."

"You do?"

Laura smiled a little bit at Steve. "Of course. I'm married to Clint and Natasha is godmother to our children... there are dozens of plans in place. Like fire drills... only ten times more intense. And even if we didn't, Loki needs near constant care. Where else is he going to be able to get that?" she asked.

"Well, I could-oh, here we go," Tony straightened a bit in his seat. He did something on his phone. "Yeah, this looks like the full deal on Reindeer Games. Interrogation transcripts, incident reports, and stuff like that." Tony let out a low whistle. "There's a lot in here."

"Incident reports?" Clint asked.

"Uh, let's see..." Tony tapped on his phone a few times. "Looks like Rudolf got into a couple fights with some guards. But I mean, if they were trying to give me brain damage I'd probably fight them too."

"We don't know that they were trying to do that," Steve said. "But we can look at those later. What we need to find first is any medical reports so we can treat Loki's... condition better. Have you found anything like that Tony?"

Tony nodded a little bit without looking up. "Yeah. I think this here is a medical thing. Document was generated by some sort of doctor at least. Let's see, let's see. Oh, okay. It's a short one. Advising something about the strength of sedatives be increased. That sounds super healthy... Oh, and that's just the tip of this iceberg. I think I need more than a phone to go through all of these. You've got a computer, right, Clint?" 

"Yeah," Clint said.

"It's upstairs. I'll go get it," Laura said.

"Thanks," Tony said as his frown grew. "I'm trying to find the first reports. See if I can't put together some sort of timeline or something."

"What's the date on the sedative report?" Natasha asked.

"Four months ago," Tony said.

Clint did some quick math in his head. That meant that they had last done something medical with Loki at best a month before Clint had even found out about him. Considering how badly injured Loki actually _was_ that didn't bode well for how long he'd been SHIELD's prisoner. Or how attentive his care had been. Well, Clint had sort of already known that they hadn't taken good care of him, but he wasn't sure if he wanted to know how _long_ that neglect had gone on for. That sort of thought just made Clint's skin crawl with discomfort.

A minute later, Laura came back down into the living room with the laptop already on and open in her arms. "Here, Tony."

"You are the best," Tony said as he reached out to take the machine. He raised an eyebrow at the various stickers across the back (some of which were half torn off) and the scuff marks on the side of the laptop. "Remind me to send you guys a new computer... this is just sad," he said as he started immediately typing away at it.

"It's only a year old, Tony," Clint said with exasperation.

"It wasn't even that good when you bought it," Tony said. "You should have let me build you something better than getting this off the shelf thing."

"Don't be a tech snob, Tony," Bruce said.

"I can't help it," Tony said.

Laura shook her head a little. "Well, if you want to give us a brand new computer, I'm not going to say no. We can leave this one to the kids and keep that one for important things. But, I should go and feed Loki. I'll be back," Laura said before giving Clint a peck of a kiss and moving out of the room.

Clint watched her go before turning his attention back to Tony who's fingers were still flying across the keyboard. "There's like an entire book in here," Tony muttered.

"Well, if he's been held for over four months, that makes sense," Steve said with his arms folded. He looked particularly pensive and unhappy, and Clint was a little concerned about what might be going through his head. Especially considering how he'd mentioned the war earlier.

"Can I get the break down of those drugs they were giving him?" Bruce asked.

"Uh, lemme find it..."

"I've already got that," Clint said as he reached to the side to pick up the long list and handed it to Bruce. "Lots and lots of sedatives and pain killers and stuff. Like enough to kill an elephant."

Bruce frowned and started reading the list. "... he was being given all of this?" he asked.

"Yeah," Clint said. "I've gone ahead and gotten some of the stronger stuff here in case he reacts badly to not having it. Like withdrawal or something but... I mean, I don't really want to be the one drugging him unless it's actually necessary..." Clint was usually comfortable with most simple medical things and giving shots or something was so basic as to barely register. But, there was something a little off about the whole situation. Probably the fact that Loki couldn't do much if Clint messed it up and couldn't really consent to getting the drugs in the first place.

"It's good to have on hand," Bruce said. "This cocktail is ridiculously potent. I wouldn't have ever thought to put animal tranquilizers in something for a person. Hopefully it hasn't damaged his liver or anything. I should probably draw some blood and do a work-up."

"That's probably another reason to move Loki somewhere else," Natasha said. "More actual medical equipment."

Just then Laura shouted for Clint, sounding panicked. Clint sprung over the back of his chair and rushed to see what the problem was. He was vaguely aware of the others right behind him but the moment he reached Loki's room that was driven out of his head. Loki was on his bed violently twitching and shaking. With only the briefest moment to register that it looked very much like the ex-God was having a seizure, Clint rushed to the bed side and pulled Loki onto his side.

The food that Laura had been feeding Loki was spilled across the bed and was getting everywhere as Loki's body jerked uncontrollably. Clint knew not to hold Loki down but it was hard to stop himself with how Loki was shaking and twisting in strange, uncomfortable looking ways. He was making strange noises as Clint hovered -wanting to help but not sure how he even could. Blood began to dribble down Loki's chin and Clint cringed as he realized he must have bitten his tongue. Hopefully that wasn't too bad.

After what Clint counted to be a gruelingly long minute and ten seconds, Loki fell still on the bed again. Laura had backed away from the bed and was looking at Loki with horror. Clint wasn't sure what to do at first but was saved when Bruce stepped forward.

"Has he had one of these before?" Bruce asked as he began to check over the now entirely limp Loki.

"No," Laura said shaking her head.

"Bruce?" Steve asked.

"There's a couple possibilities," Bruce said as he opened Loki's mouth to examine his tongue. "Either this is drug withdrawal, or he's got some sort of an infection, or it's a side effect of whatever brain damage they gave him..."

Clint wasn't sure which of those options would be the best. Probably the infection one, right? Then at least it was a fairly simple fix. Antibiotics and stuff, right? "... weren't some of those drugs in the cocktail they were pumping in him anti-seizure medications?" Tony asked after a minute.

Bruce paused for a heartbeat before going back to what he was doing. "Some of them are used that way... but not only that. I wouldn't have immediately thought they were used to control seizures," Bruce said as he used some of the now dirty sheets to wipe the blood from Loki's chin and lips. "Of course, if they did add drugs for that reason there were more effective ones to use. It should be in the medical portion of those documents you found, Tony."

"I'll get them all together for you," Tony said.

Steve nodded but seemed slightly distracted. "Make that first priority, I don't want any more surprises like this," he ordered in his most no nonsense Captain America voice.

Clint sighed a little at the mess Loki now was. "Is he alright, Bruce? Because we should probably clean him up..."

Bruce checked a few other things before nodding. "I think so. Not much else we can do here anyway..."

"I'll be out in a bit," Clint said as he went to pick Loki up off the bed. He was a bit surprised when Steve was there helping him before he'd even turned to the bathroom, but wasn't about to protest. Loki was pretty heavy despite how thin he still was.

As Clint and Steve got Loki into the bathroom, Laura moved to start stripping the bed yet again. "Where're the sheets?" Natasha asked quietly just before Clint had to turn all of his attention to what he was doing with Loki.


	7. Chapter 7

LOG: I.001  
DATE: 10.11.2012  
TIME: 13:04:36  
LOCATION: REDACTED

> Loki was sitting in the middle of a shaft of light chained to a metal chair that was welded to the equally metal floor. He had no shoes and just a pair of thin pants and a loose beige shirt on. His eyes were closed, and though he had bruises and a fat lip didn't seem too roughed up at the moment. "Are you just going linger in the shadows for much longer attempting your little intimidation technique, or are we to get to the pointless interrogation eventually?" Loki said to seemingly nobody. "If you take much longer, I might as well get a nap in."
> 
> "You're awfully cocky for someone who's got a life sentence," the unmistakable voice of Fury said.
> 
> Loki shrugged. "As you said. A life sentence. It isn't as if you can kill me. I take it Odin was quite clear on that condition, at least?"
> 
> There was a moment of silence, but then Fury stepped into the light finally. "We can do a lot without killing you," Fury said.
> 
> Loki didn't seem concerned. "Perhaps. But if you think me a sniveling weakling to crumble under a little pain, then you are mistaken. Don't feel bad about that, though. You'd hardly be the first," Loki said as he opened his eyes to look at Fury directly. "And I know for a fact that Odin has given you limited time to sate your thirst for my blood. Five years, I believe? That is not so long for a God."
> 
> "You're not a God," Fury said.
> 
> "Compared to you, I am," Loki said without missing a beat. "But I must say I have some curiosity about this deal that you managed to strike... Whatever do you think to gain by all of this?" he asked.
> 
> "It's called justice," Fury said.
> 
> Loki laughed, his green eyes sparkling. "Oh, please, Fury," Loki said, still smiling. "I think we both know better. You're after something with this deal, and you think I can give it to you... the question is simply, what?"
> 
> Fury circled Loki slowly in his chair. Loki didn't bother shifting to keep Fury in his view and seemed entirely relaxed. "You're not the type to torture someone, which is what I can assume this 'interrogation' will eventually break down into when I don't tell you what you want, for no reason. No... I definitely have something you want. Well. I suppose I have an awful lot you want, don't I?" Loki's grin widened to something manic and unpleasant. "But you can't steal my immortality or the secrets of my race. One I cannot give and the other I do not rightly know... therefore perhaps you wish information on Asgard? Looking for secrets that you can exploit against the Golden Realm like the paranoid, distrustful spy that you are? I can't say I disapprove. But I must admit I still won't be terribly helpful."
> 
> "I'm not looking for information on Asgard," Fury said.
> 
> "No? Then you're stupid," Loki said instantly. "And you didn't strike me as a, particularly stupid opponent. Foolish, certainly. But not stupid."
> 
> "I'm only looking for closure for what you did to my men," Fury said as he came to a stop in front of Loki again, his arms folded behind his back.
> 
> Loki smiled. "Yes... that's what you told Dear AllFather... but, you know what I'm God of, Director... I can smell a lie a mile off. And that... is most definitely a lie. A very blatant one. So do drop the pretense and tell me what you want. It will make this tedium so much faster."
> 
> Fury narrowed his one eye. "If you're so smart. I'm sure you can figure it out," Fury said.
> 
> Loki sighed dramatically. "The hard way then. Of course. Whatever happened to civility?"
> 
> "That's rich coming from a murderous psychopath."
> 
> "Do learn proper definitions, Director. I am far from a psychopath," Loki said. "That is a very distinct diagnosis to which I do not fit."
> 
> Fury scowled and leaned close. "We'll get what we want out of you, Loki. We have five uninterrupted years to figure you out and make you talk."
> 
> "Director," Loki said, seemingly still amused. "People much smarter than you have been trying to figure me out for centuries. Five years will barely tell you how I like my food prepared."
> 
> "We'll see."
> 
> Loki laughed again. "You are so very confident when you have no reason to be."
> 
> Fury straightened again. "I have every reason to be. Nobody from Asgard can interfere with what we do here. I have Odin's word and that, if I understand, is as good as Law."
> 
> Loki shrugged. "It won't help you one bit."
> 
> There was a moment of silence that stretched uncomfortably long. Two minutes. Then five. Then finally, ten. "Since you mentioned you're particular about your food... I think we shouldn't bother trying to achieve perfection for your _highness_. I'm sure, given a few days, you'll tell us 'how you like it.'"
> 
> Loki visibly rolled his eyes. "Starvation, is it? How very droll," he said. Loki sighed heavily. "Very well, if you feel you must."

* * *

"That's the first interrogation on record," Tony said as the video went black. "I imagine right after they got him in custody from what Fury was saying."

"If that date is right, he was sent back to Earth pretty soon after the invasion," Bruce pointed out.

Clint couldn't help but frown. That meant that as of right then, Loki had been on Earth for almost three years. Clint had only found out about Loki four months ago. Loki had gone from defiant and perfectly able to spew his assholish opinions to mentally fried in a little over two and a half years. That was frighteningly quickly.

Clint both did and did not want to know how many sessions they had used the scepter on Loki before he became like he was now.

"How many interrogation logs are there?" Steve asked.

Tony scrolled down a long list of files. "... three hundred seventy-eight. Some are just text, and some are videos. This one here, fifty-seven, is just text." Tony opened it, and a large text file popped up on the screen. Tony skimmed through it for a moment and made a face. "A bunch of questions about what happened in Germany and why Reindeer Games made such a show. Then it looks like Loki started asking Fury if the idea of eyeballs being removed was triggering," Tony said with a slight smirk. The smirk fell soon after that. "Ah... looks like he was, um, punished from something called The Drip for that... don't know what that is but sounds ominous."

"I'll look through the logs," Natasha said. "I'll probably get more information out of it than any of you will."

Steve nodded in agreement, and Tony handed the laptop over to Natasha without protest. Nobody really wanted to look at what seemed to promise to slowly devolve into torture sessions. But Natasha was right that she was the one most likely able to glean something useful out of all the recordings and transcripts.

"Any progress on the medical records, Bruce?" Steve asked.

Bruce sighed and went back to the stack of papers that he'd abandoned when Tony had called for their attention. "Not really much that's helpful, no," Bruce said. "Most of what I've come across so far is documenting injuries caused by, and inflicted onto, Loki. Various drugs that they were trying to use to subdue Loki and minor observations. They haven't started injecting him with a cocktail of their own making yet. Still, several of the doctors made notes that they would probably have to do that to find something strong enough that Loki wouldn't metabolize in only a few minutes."

"Well, I guess it's good to know they didn't just start pumping poison in him immediately," Steve muttered unhappily.

Clint's watch beeped, and he sighed. "I'll be back, guys." The others acknowledged that but didn't follow as Clint went to the kitchen to get some yogurt and nearly pulverized bits of fruit. He also got a vegetable broth with tiny chunks of meat and noodles in it. Calling it soup, Clint thought, would be a bit too generous.

Laura had taken the kids out to a neighbor's house so that as the information about Loki was poured over, they wouldn't accidentally hear anything that they shouldn't. That left Clint with Loki's care. Well, Clint and the others if he called for help. Clint carried the tray of easy-to-spoon-feed food into Loki's room and set it on the side table. Loki was staring at nothing again, and Clint sighed.

"You know, I'm probably crazy for thinking this... but I almost think I prefer you being an asshole," Clint said as he picked up the broth and the spoon. "At least that seemed a bit more natural..."

Loki, of course, didn't respond to that at all. Clint had to prod his mouth a little with the spoon to get Loki to notice he was being fed. When he did, he opened his mouth without even looking at Clint. Clint shook his head and realized how easy it really would be for anyone to just kill Loki right now. There was no sense of danger or self-preservation in him at all. Anyone could come in and feed Loki pure poison, and Loki would just let them.

Loki swallowed the warm broth and automatically opened his mouth for more when Clint held up the spoon. "Don't let any of this fool you, Loki," Clint said as he pulled the spoon back and got some bits of carrot in the mix this time. "I still hate what you did to me. I don't think I'll ever forgive that you for what you did. But, you aren't him, so I guess we're starting over..."

Clint wasn't entirely sure why he'd decided to tell Loki that, especially since he had no idea how much Loki understood. But with the words out, a little bit of the uneasy weight on his chest and shoulders had eased. Certainly not gone away but was a bit easier to bear. Like he told the others. Loki wasn't a threat anymore. From what Clint had seen, Loki was never going to be that person again, even if he did recover somewhat from what had happened to him. So, holding onto that anger and bitterness seemed... petty? No. Petty wasn't right. Tiresome maybe. Pointless. Certainly unhealthy for Clint. So for his own well-being, he would try to let go.

Loki opened his mouth for another spoonful of broth. A glimmer out of the corner of Clint's eyes caused him to pause as he pulled the spoon out of Loki's mouth. Green and golden lights were sparkling from Loki's fingers. As Clint watched, the sparks and little wisps of color twisted and shifted above Loki's lax hand. "You still have your magic?" Clint asked despite knowing he wouldn't get an answer. That was not something that he'd realized.

Clint had assumed that Loki's powers had been removed or contained or something. Maybe they had been, but somehow after everything that happened, he wasn't restrained anymore. The drugs, possibly? Or something in the cell that they'd been keeping him in.

Loki didn't seem to be consciously doing anything, and Clint almost automatically gave the crippled God some more food as he watched the light dance above Loki's palm. Clint had to admit it was rather pretty if also somewhat alarming. Loki having his magic, wasn't something that Clint had been considering at all and so wasn't prepared for.

As Clint continued to watch, the glowing lines of energy and little sparks of color slowly seemed to bend and twist more deliberately. Then Clint's eyes widened as a bird made of pure light was suddenly standing there in Loki's hand. Clint froze as he watched the bird's head twist from side to side, and its wings spread a few times before folding back against its sleek body.

Clint looked up at Loki, who was for the first time Clint could remember since getting him away from Shield, smiling ever so slightly. It was a soft thing, only pulling slightly at his mouth, but it was easy to see compared to the blank expression the ex-Prince customarily held. "Loki..."

Loki watched the bird hop in his hand and spread its wings again, seemingly entirely enamored with the illusion. Clint slowly looked back, and the green bird hopped off of Loki's hand and fluttered silently up to land on Clint's shoulder. It was about halfway through that short flight that Clint realized something. That wasn't just any bird Loki had made form in his hand. It was a _hawk_.


	8. Chapter 8

"So, Loki still has his magic," Clint said after putting the dishes away in the kitchen. Everyone in the living room paused what they were doing and looked over. "Or got it back or something," he added. When the others still just stared with various levels of surprise and horror, Clint nodded. "Yeah. I thought so too."

"What happened?" Steve asked, flexing his fingers by his side as if he were fighting the urge to grab something. Most likely, the shield sitting beside the chair he had taken over.

Clint sighed a little bit. "I was feeding him, and I noticed something going on with his hand. Looked down to see this green light. Next thing I know... I don't know what to call it, but, I guess, some sort of hologram was there? A green bird was just standing in his hand, and it flew up onto my shoulder. Fluttered around for a hot minute, then disappeared again."

There was a moment of silence. "Well, that... adds a dimension to this, doesn't it?" Bruce asked rhetorically as he put the medical files down in front of him. He rubbed his forehead with his hand and seemed exasperated. "Because that's what we needed was more complication," he added in a low voice.

"It must be that he got it back," Tony said. "Can't see Prancer letting us measly humans do anything to him if he had his magic voodoo the whole time." Natasha nodded in agreement.

"My concern," Bruce said. "Is we have no idea how Loki's magic works. The guy just had a seizure. If his magic has some sort of brain activity element... who knows if it might damage him more or trigger more seizures or if he should even be doing it."

"Do you think that's likely?" Steve asked.

Bruce shrugged. "I think it's definitely possible," he said. "If he can do it now with limited higher brain functions, then I imagine it's not solely based on knowing spells or waving a wand or... however, he did those things before. But I'd be extremely surprised if it didn't take any brainpower at all."

"Well... maybe there's something in all these files that will tell us some way to keep him from using his magic," Tony said. "If it's nothing too terrible, then we should probably use it too."

"At least, until we find out more about how his magic works and that it isn't dangerous," Bruce agreed. "To him or others." There didn't seem to be anything else that they could do about the situation, so they settled down to continue pouring through the various pilfered information. 

About an hour later, Laura and the kids came home. Natasha and Bruce took the kids outside to keep them from seeing anything they shouldn't while the others cleaned up and hid away the information on Loki. Tony got into his suit. "I have some thoughts. I'll be back tomorrow sometime after I figure some things out," Tony said before his helmet snapped over his face. "Let me know if anything comes up," he added though his voice was now being modulated.

With that, Tony took off back to the city. Laura recruited a slightly flustered but obedient Captain America to help in the kitchen to make dinner for five adults, two kids, and a brain-damaged alien. Clint was a little surprised at _how much_ food that ended up being.

When Steve took the bowl of mashed potatoes, slivers of meat, and finely diced vegetables, Clint was surprised. "I'll feed Loki," Steve said. "It's not fair for you to always be doing it."

Clint hesitated for a moment but then nodded. "Thanks, Steve. He's not quick, so just wait for him to come to you."

Steve gave a pained smile. "I've fed sick people before, Clint," he said softly. "I got it." 

Clint suddenly remembered that Peggy was in a nursing home with an ever-worsening case of dementia. And that Steve visited her frequently. Clint was officially a terrible, selfish person, and he wanted to smack himself for his stupidity. "Right. Sorry."

"It's alright," Steve said.

As Steve went into the back room, Natasha put a hand to Clint's shoulder. "It's easy to forget things when people don't talk about it much," she said softly. "Don't beat yourself up about it. He doesn't like it when people feel guilty like that."

"I am just failing on all social levels lately," Clint said with a sigh. "I think _Tony_ is doing better than me."

"Being too hard on yourself," Natasha said. "Terror one and two want you to help them get ready for bed tonight."

Clint rubbed the back of his head. "Haven't been doing it lately what with taking care of Loki."

"Well, now you have help so you can," Natasha reasoned. "Go on and spend time with my godchildren, Clint."

"Thanks, Nat," Clint said before squeezing her hand on his shoulder. She flashed a smile and went to go talk to Bruce. Clint watched her for a moment and couldn't help but feel bad. She really would have made a great mother.

Clint made his way upstairs to go, make sure his kids were winding down to eventually get ready for bed. Only a few minutes into the situation, let Clint know that Lila and Cooper weren't in the least interested in that idea. So, Clint let them stay up a bit and read to them and just talked like he hadn't had a chance to do it what felt like ages. They had a lot of things to catch up on apparently as both rambled on about various things for seemingly endless hours.

Clint eventually got roped into telling them a long, drawn-out, and definitely not thought up on the spot story about one of his adventures saving the world. Really it was just a shoddy retelling of Jack and the Beanstalk with some spy stuff thrown in, and the giants were aliens, but they didn't seem to notice. They enjoyed it at least even if they asked way too many probing questions for a simple story. His own fault really for including a talking harp like in the fairy tale. He just called it AI and moved on, but they wanted details. By the time he got away from that, he'd made up some truly bizarre answers like the harp was half robot and no the strings weren't really gold they were... light. Or, as Cooper insisted, lasers, why not? At least they seemed satisfied with the answers.

Around nine-thirty, Clint finally managed to get both of them settled in bed and tucked in. Both protested that they weren't tired, but Clint knew once they were actually lying down with their eyes closed, they wouldn't last long. They never did. 

Turning off the lights, Clint made his way back downstairs. Most of the lower level was empty. He could hear someone moving around in the kitchen and made his way there. Steve was washing the same dishes he'd taken in to feed Loki. "Hey. How'd it go?" Clint asked.

"He ate it all, no problem," Steve said.

"Any more magic?"

Steve paused and then nodded. "Yeah. Mostly just little wisps of light and little sparks. I don't think he noticed he was doing it." Clint nodded, and they slipped into silence for a minute. "Bruce and Natasha went on a walk. Bruce said he was starting to get a bit... upset with all the files he was reading. Thought it best to get some air."

"Yeah, that sounds like it was probably a good idea," Clint agreed.

"I've been thinking..." Steve said, hesitantly. "Should we have some sort of... I don't know, monitor, or something in the room? In case Loki's magic starts being dangerous, or he has another seizure or something? Bruce said that people have died from having seizures in their sleep."

Clint thought about it for a moment before he shrugged. "I suppose it can't hurt, although I don't know how we would monitor the magic thing. I have the kids' old baby monitor, though, so we could at least listen for if something's happening," Clint suggested.

"I think it would probably be best. I-I would hate for something to happen to Thor's brother while we were looking after him," Steve said, not without some awkwardness.

Clint nodded. "Yeah, that would be... uncomfortable to explain." Thor might not know that the others were here and helping, but he had trusted Clint to look after Loki while he as gone. "Hope things get worked out quick up in Asgard."

"Me too."

Clint returned to the living room and started flipping through reports again. Loki had definitely not always been such a docile captive going by what Shield's documents said. After about twenty minutes, Natasha and Bruce returned, although Bruce looked a bit harrowed. "You should probably get some rest," Natasha said. "The records will be here in the morning."

Bruce hesitated for a minute before nodding a little. "Probably smart..."

Clint watched as Bruce gathered up his things and went to the one spare bedroom that still remained in the house. It was small and cramped and had originally been the nursery when the kids were still in diapers, but it did have a bed and a door. So far, they had been rotating who was using it and who was sleeping out in the living room. It seemed as if Bruce was claiming it for tonight.

Once the door upstairs closed, Bruce looked to Natasha. "Something specific set him off or just... everything?" he asked quietly.

"I think it was something specific," Natasha said in an equally hushed voice. "He was sitting there reading when he suddenly put it all down and said he needed air."

Clint frowned and looked at the pile of papers that Bruce had been working his way through earlier. He'd resisted looking at them, figuring they'd be all too jam-packed with medical jargon to understand anyway, but now he wondered if he shouldn't at least glance. Not that he really wanted details to what Loki had been through, but if it meant something that would have repercussions, he probably should know. 

Then again, Bruce would have said if it was something that would be having lingering side effects. Bruce wasn't the sort of guy who just wouldn't say anything. Clint sighed and rubbed his face with his hands. This mess just wouldn't stop. "You should get some rest, too," Natasha said. "I'll be up if anything happens."

"You're sure?" Clint asked.

Natasha nodded. "Of course, besides... I have a ton of my own part of the reports to read through still. I've only just gotten to them asking where Loki got the army of aliens from."

"What'd he say?" Clint asked.

"That he 'was not the only monster lurking in the cold depths of space' like the drama queen of the century," Natasha said with an eye roll. 

"Bet Fury loved that answer," Clint said with a snort.

Natasha shrugged. "They haven't started outright torturing him yet from what I've read. Not really looking forward to when that switches. It's never fun to read."

Clint nodded in agreement. He was well aware of that, and he didn't even have the potential for flashbacks to a previous occupation like Natasha did. Or. Not as many. "It gets too much you tell us, alright?" Clint said. "It's not worth you getting yourself back into a bad place just to figure out what they managed to get out of Loki."

"I'll be fine, Clint," Natasha said. "You know me."

"I do, that's why I'm telling you not to push yourself," Clint said firmly. "I don't want to see you like that again." When Clint had first taken Natasha in after she defected to SHIELD, she had been a mess of paranoia, hyper-vigilance, and unresolved trauma. She still hadn't worked through a lot of it, but at least now she could sit in a room without constantly checking the exits or shifting her position in case of snipers. Then again, Natasha was better here at the farm than a lot of others. She knew for a fact that Clint had methodically gone through and removed or blocked every sniper position he could.

Natasha gave a wane smile. "I'll keep it in mind. Go to bed, Clint. You've been getting up early and going to bed late for several days now."

"Alright. But don't stay up too late yourself," Clint said. Natasha agreed, but Clint didn't hold out too much hope. Clint glanced at the pile of medical records and then decided that if it was something he needed to know, Bruce would definitely tell him. He shouldn't go digging because he knew he wouldn't like what he found.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's a bit short but we're about to do a little bit of a time jump and I thought it would be weird to have it at the end of a chapter rather than a beginning of one.


	9. Chapter 9

Two weeks went by, and Loki had suffered five more seizures, two in rapid succession and another three with a few days in-between each. The headway in looking through the pilfered documents was starting to reveal valuable, albeit unpleasant, information. Loki had never been cooperative with Shield's questions, so it hadn't taken long for them to resort to less humane ways of trying to make him talk. Starvation was just the first thing they tried. The Drip turned out to be an acid drip in the style of Chinese Water Torture. And there were still the old standbys of waterboarding and general beatings for insolent answers. Which Loki gave a lot of. Clint suspected Natasha hadn't shared all the more creative methods of trying to get Loki to talk. Still, he couldn't exactly be upset by that.

The physical abuse hadn't seemed to affect Loki all that much. He kept his cockiness and smart mouth for a long time. But then Natasha got to the point where they started using the scepter. The first time they used it on Loki had been recorded as a video. It had been incredibly disturbing to hear the flat monotone he'd used when they were forcing him to talk, and then he'd started bleeding from his ears, and they'd quickly stopped the session. Shield must have thought the side effect wasn't that bad, though, because it hadn't stopped them from going in with the scepter again a few weeks later. From the dates on the reports, they figured that after about five of the scepter sessions was when Loki had his first seizure. Bruce said that was evidence that the seizures were from brain damage and not drug withdrawal or an infection. And that, unfortunately, meant it was probably going to be a problem for a long time yet. Very possibly, the rest of his life.

Clint was starting to get antsy about what was taking Thor so long to get back, though. He had expected the God of Thunder to return in a couple days, not a few weeks. Tony suggested time might work differently on Asgard, and that was at least something that settled Clint's anxiety a little bit. Nobody had ever asked Thor something like 'how long is your day compared to ours.' They just sort of _assumed_ time worked the same way. Of course, it didn't help all of Clint's anxiety because that was purely speculation. Another possibility was that Odin threw Thor into a dungeon or something for going and breaking Loki out in the first place. That would be a much less pleasant reason for Thor taking so long.

Loki's magic light show kept going too. He was starting to form more shapes, and Clint was starting to suspect Loki was trying to figure out some sort of communication with them. Because every time Clint came in to take care of Loki, at some point, Loki would form that hawk of green and gold lights. Considering what Loki used to call him, it seemed likely that at least something of the old Loki was still buried very deep inside. More evidence leading him to think that was that Natasha, the few times she was around while Loki did his magic puppet show had a spider of light crawling up her arm. Stars always seemed to show up around Steve, and when Bruce would check up on Loki or give him medication, a tiny bear would be walking around Loki's covers. He hadn't seemed to have found anything for Tony yet, but then Tony was very rarely around Loki. He was still busy with SI and, though he was helping with Loki, that tended to be more in the form of new little gadgets that were supposed to make things easier. After a week, the others had left the farm, although they were frequent visitors to check-in or just help take care of Loki.

Clint was currently feeding Loki a bit of yogurt with tiny bits of fruit and granola mixed in. The television was on to some brightly colored animated movie with the volume turned way down, but from what Clint could see, Loki never paid the TV any sort of attention. He was more likely to be found staring out of the window than the television.

Loki's fingers were sparking with green and gold, but no shapes were forming. Clint was getting pretty used to the sight since they had yet to find any sort of way of stopping him from using his magic. Tony had tried bracelets and different types of field generating machines, but nothing had seemed to work to keep Loki from tapping into his powers. They just had to hope it wasn't going to trigger a seizure or anything like that.

Loki was getting better at eating. A little bit faster and able to handle things that weren't turned extremely soft. He'd had meatloaf the other day. It was kind of sad that that was now a benchmark for someone who had been in charge of an entire army. Clint gave Loki another spoonful of his breakfast as he heard the kids clomping down the stairs like a bunch of horses or something.

Laura scolded them for being so loud even though Loki rarely seemed to notice. "Tony's almost done with the medical floor in the tower," Clint said. "When it's done, Bruce wants to take you in to check you out." Clint had found that he kind of felt too awkward just feeding Loki in silence, so he'd started talking to Loki. At first, it was about nothing. Just random bits about harmless things involved in running a farm. But eventually, Clint had loosened up and started telling Loki about whatever popped into his head, including plans involving him. "He wants to see how bad they messed up your brain. He thinks it'll help him treat you."

Loki, as was now entirely usual, didn't seem to even hear Clint and just slowly chewed the bits of granola and fruit before swallowing. "Of course, Tony has suggested just moving you to the Tower, but I don't know how good an idea that is. There are a lot more people around at the Tower. Harder to keep you being there a secret." Clint wouldn't exactly mind Loki being out of his house, but he couldn't shake the worry that it would be a mess. 

There were plenty of people with grudges still, and Loki couldn't defend himself against any retribution they might want to enact. Plus, Clint didn't exactly think it would be good for those that had trauma from the invasion to have Loki nearby either. It was just better to be out here where all of that wasn't even an issue.

A few minutes later, Clint noticed the lights at Loki's fingertips were starting to combine and swirl the way they did when he was trying to form a shape. Clint paused to look since Loki had already made the hawk when Clint had first come in. The sparks of light collected and a familiar-looking hammer made of light was hanging there in the air above Loki's hand. "Thor?" That was really the only thing Loki could be trying to communicate. Clint frowned. "He's not here, Loki. But he'll be back soon."

The hammer spun above Loki's palm, and Loki was staring at it. Clint sighed and held up the spoon, although Loki didn't open his mouth to take the yogurt. "Loki. He'll be back. Now come on, we're almost done," Clint said.

Loki still didn't open his mouth. It was very unusual for him, and Clint sighed before putting the bowl to the side. Before he could even think about it or second guess the instinct, Clint took Loki's hand, disrupting the magic and making the hammer break apart into harmless dots of light. "Loki. I know it's been a while, but your brother will be back. He's not the type to just leave you here," Clint said. "Believe me, he loves you a hell of a lot." Thor had more than proved that by how he'd reduced the Shield complex to rubble while they broke Loki out.

Loki's eyes wandered for a moment before drifting towards Clint. His gaze didn't fully settle on Clint's face; instead it landed just off to the left. "You're finally getting some weight back up. Don't stop eating now." There was a glimmer of light, and Clint saw another green and gold hammer appear in the air above Loki's other hand. He sighed in frustration. "Loki, Thor will be back," he repeated. "And think of how happy he'll be if, when he does, you've gained a whole lot of weight and look this much better than when he left."

Because Loki was looking better. After two weeks, all his bruises and cuts were gone. The only injury still visible was the mostly closed gash on his head. The infection had slowed it's healing, but now it was looking much better, and some of the surrounding hair they'd had to shave off was growing back.

The illusory hammer floated for another moment before sparkling out of existence. Clint waited a moment, and when it didn't come back, he picked up Loki's bowl again. He held up another spoonful. There were about thirty seconds of pause, and then Loki opened his mouth. "Thank you," Clint said as he got back to feeding the injured ex-God.

Unfortunately, that seemed to set a precedent. For the next two days, every meal would be stopped for several minutes as Loki made a hammer out of light and had to be told that Thor wasn't there. Then he would have to be coaxed back to eating. It made an already long process even longer, but there wasn't a whole lot to be done about it. Clint couldn't tell if Loki was forgetting what he'd been told or just was being persistent. 

It wasn't until the third day from when Loki had started making Thor's hammer appear that the familiar sound of the sky ripping open for the Bifrost, filled the air. Clint, remembering how bad that noise had been reacted to before, hurried into Loki's room. He got there just as the slam of the Bifrost landing echoed, and Loki freaked out in much the same way he had before. Gripping his head and thrashing. Clint was able to keep Loki from hurting himself, but it was a struggle since Loki was still incredibly strong. "Loki! Calm down! It's the Bifrost! You know what that is! The Rainbow Bridge? Loki!"

That didn't seem to help much, although eventually, Loki stopped struggling. Clint sighed and slowly allowed his grip on Loki's arms to relax. "... what was that?"

Clint turned to look at a rather horrified looking Thor standing in the doorway. Clint had been so consumed with Loki he hadn't noticed at what point Thor had come inside. "Thor." Clint sighed and got up after making sure that Loki wasn't struggling anymore. The paler Asgardian was just laying there distantly staring at the ceiling. "It's the Bifrost," Clint said as he went to Thor, who was staring at his brother. "It happened last time too. It seems to trigger something in him. If I could have warned you about it, I would have, but I didn't know how to send you a message," Clint said.

"Why... why would the Bifrost frighten him so?" Thor asked. "We have travelled by it since we were children..."

"I don't know, buddy. I really don't," Clint said. Clint glanced over at Loki, glad that he'd just taken the ex-God to the bathroom a little before this, and so there was no sign of an accident to clean up. "But he'll be alright. He's been asking for you."

Thor looked at Clint sharply. "Truly? He's speaking?"

"Ah... not-no. It's... he's making illusions with his magic. Simple stuff. I think it's how he's trying to talk to us. He's been making your hammer for the last couple of days. So I figured he was asking for you," Clint explained. He felt a little bad for getting Thor's hopes up like that.

Thor didn't seem as disappointed as Clint was expecting, though. "He's using his magic?" Clint nodded. Thor smiled and looked at Loki again. "That he still can is a good sign. Mother was afraid that, with what I'd been able to tell her, he wouldn't be capable any longer."

Thor moved from the door to his brother's side. "Brother. I've returned. I am sorry to have taken so long," he said as he reached over and shifted Loki into a slightly more natural-looking position. "And I am sorry you had to ask for me. I did not mean to make you wait."

"Did you get permission to bring a healer or whoever?" Clint asked.

Thor scowled a little bit as he brushed his brother's hair back. "Yes, although it took far more arguing than I would have liked. My Mother will come down tomorrow with a healer to see what can be done to heal Loki," Thor said. "Do you hear, Brother? Mother will be coming to see you." 

There was no response.

Clint could see how much that hurt just by Thor's expression. The God of Thunder had a truly terrible poker face. "The others know," Clint said, wanting to distract Thor from the reality of Loki not having a clue who 'Mother' was. "Shield told them we broke Loki out, and they came to investigate."

Thor turned enough to look at Clint. "... and how did our friends react?" he asked warily.

"Well, there was a bit of distrust and talk of possible mind control. But, they've all realized that he really is in a bad way," Clint said. He was definitely not going to mention the fact that Natasha had fired a gun during the whole confusion. "So, they've been helping. Don't worry, Thor. The Avengers are behind you on this one."

The tension on Thor's face melted into a smile. "Truly, you are warriors of great honor, and I am glad to be counted among your friends," he said. 

"Don't mention it," Clint said, feeling somewhat embarrassed by the honest appreciation in Thor's voice. Seeing Thor so thankful still reminded Clint that he hadn't rushed to save Loki in the first place. That the only reason he'd discovered Loki at all was because he'd gone looking for his own revenge. "Is there a way to tell your Mom to drop down somewhere further from the house so that the Bifrost doesn't trigger Loki?"

Thor frowned a little but nodded. "Yes, of course. Is there a place you are thinking of?"

"A couple miles out there's an airstrip I use when I'm going off on missions. That should be far enough and plenty clear of any civilians or obstructions," Clint said. "I can pick them up from there if you need me to."

"No, I can easily do so with Mjolnir," Thor said. "I will instruct Heimdall to direct the Bifrost there."

"Ah, he's that guy that sees everything, right?"

"Our gatekeeper, yes," Thor said. "My father had ordered him to not look for my brother while he was on Earth. Said it was part of the... agreement."

Clint wasn't quite sure what to say to that. He was terribly curious but also apprehensive about just how it was allowed that Loki had ended up like he was currently. "And... did he follow orders?" Clint finally asked.

"Heimdall is very loyal," Thor said. That wasn't _really_ an answer, but Clint figured it meant that yes, he'd followed the orders his King gave him. There was the distant sound of thunder rumbling, and then Thor shook his head. "We can talk of this later. There is... much to 'unpack' as Tony says. And I think I may require much beer or ale to do so."

"Well, I'm sure Tony can find a guy to get you whatever you want," Clint said.


	10. Chapter 10

Thor sighed as he slumped down on the couch. Everyone who had been close enough to come and hear what Thor had to report had done so. Tony had been caught up with a Stark Conference in Japan, and (though he tried to sneak out) Pepper hadn't allowed him to leave. Bruce had been in New York, helping set up the last bits of the medical level that had always been in the plans but now was pressing to complete. While he was on his way, Bruce didn't have the same speeding habits that Tony did and would take another twenty minutes or so to arrive. Natasha and Steve had actually been the closest and were sitting across from Thor, who had just finished a very one-sided visit with Loki. "Should we wait for the others to hear this?" Steve asked.

"I do not particularly want to explain this twice," Thor said as he took the big mug of beer that Clint was holding out to him. It was the largest in the house -more of a gag gift than an actual dish- but it could hold almost two whole bottles, which Thor would have no problem powering through. "I am not well pleased by all I have learned."

"I can imagine," Laura said as she came in carrying a large tray of sandwiches. "Here, Thor, you're probably hungry." Thor always seemed hungry, and Clint supposed human food just didn't have the calories that Thor was used to working off of or something.

Thor offered a smile that seemed a little forced. "My thanks, Lady Barton. You are incredibly kind and honorable." Thor picked one sandwich off the top of the pile to take a bite from it, but then put it to the side. He chewed for a moment before using a large swig of beer to wash it down. Thor turned to Natasha and Steve. "I also thank you, friends, for being as generous and understanding to my brother as you have been."

"Of course," Steve said. "Loki might be a criminal, but what happened to him wasn't right either."

"Still, it means much to me, and I will not be able to ever repay you for your assistance," Thor said.

"You don't have to repay us, Bud. Friends help each other out," Clint said. Plus, Clint, at least, still felt very uncomfortable being thanked by Thor with how delayed his reaction had been.

Thor nodded. "Indeed. And, should any of you ever need anything at all, you need only ask, and I am at your disposal," Thor said. "My mother will undoubtedly express similar intentions, as well. She was very upset when she learned Loki was not where she believed him to be or in the condition she expected."

"So, your Father hid it from everyone then," Steve said. "I guess he knew how much you and your Mom wouldn't like... whatever he arranged."

A heavy sigh escaped the God of Thunder. "It is not as if my mother or I expected Loki to not be punished... but what has happened... this is far worse than if they had just executed him."

"The term cruel and unusual punishment does come to mind," Laura said as she perched herself on the side of the chair that Natasha was sitting in. There was a shriek from outside as the kids chased each other through the yard. Thor turned his head to watch as Lila darted past.

By the time Bruce arrived, Clint had refilled Thor's mug twice, although Thor didn't look even slightly affected by it. "Thor. It's good to see you," Bruce greeted with a somewhat awkward smile. "I mean... sort of. Kind of not greatest reason for it..."

"True. But I am glad you have offered your help as well, Bruce," Thor said as he got up to give the mild-mannered doctor a big hug. "Knowing that Loki is under your care has eased many of my worries."

"Of course," Bruce said, patting Thor's shoulder somewhat awkwardly. Despite knowing Thor so long and his pension for physical displays of affection, Bruce still wasn't entirely used to it. "Oh, Tony had me bring this from the tower and said to plug it into your TV," Bruce said as he pulled away enough to remove what looked like a flash drive from his pocket.

Laura gestured to the flat screen hanging above the mantle. "Go ahead."

Steve had to help hold the television off the bracket it was mounted with so that Bruce could find the port that the device plugged into, but they managed it without a problem. As Steve was straightening the screen on the wall, the television suddenly turned on. "Cool. It worked," Tony said from the TV. "Wasn't sure how old your TV was, so I wasn't sure it would, but I figured it was worth a shot."

"Did you seriously just hack my TV?" Clint asked. He wasn't quite sure why he was surprised by that. When he thought about it for more than a second, he really shouldn't be. 

"Didn't Pepper say you absolutely had to attend some meeting?" Natasha asked.

"One, yes. Two, I am attending the meeting. It's right through that door there. See?" Tony shifted what must have been his phone so that they could see over his shoulder at the closed door. "They won't even miss me. I started up a slideshow, and Pep can hold them off for a bit."

Steve sighed but looked vaguely amused despite himself. "Well, we're all here... sort of. You wanna tell us what happened up in Asgard now, Thor?"

Thor retook his seat on the couch and drained about half of his mug in just a few swallows. "Yes, of course. When I first arrived home, I confronted Heimdall. He is the first person you see when you arrive, and he should have known all that was happening. He told me that he was instructed to not look for Loki on Midgard and that he would be returned to them in five of your years."

"Heimdall said he had reservations about being ordered to deliberately not keep an eye on Loki, but my Father had been clear," Thor said. He turned his mug in his hands and stared at some indeterminable point on the coffee table. "So, I went to confront my Father."

"From the look on your face, I'm going to guess it didn't go well," Natasha said.

Thor shrugged. "Not as bad as it could have gone but not as well either. Father claimed that it was in regards to the other Realms that he agreed to send Loki to Shield. He said that he was worried if any of the other Realms realized we had not permitted any recompense that the other Realms would revolt. Usually, we arrange a weregild and offer money or resources to apologize for wrongdoing. We did this with Jotunheim. But, Midgard is excluded from all current agreements to that effect because there is no one power to negotiate it with. It is a complicated legal and diplomatic matter. You as a Realm are entitled to compensation, and yet the treaties and other agreements that make getting that compensation are not currently in place as the ban to travel to Midgard is still technically in effect."

"So, the King met with several people of some importance. One of which was Director Fury. The negotiations took time, but eventually, they agreed that Shield would be allowed to hold Loki," Thor said. He paused for a few moments before taking another long drink of beer and put the empty mug down on the table in front of him. "He knew that Mother's solution would be to open trade to Midgard and pay the weregild like normal, but the council of Asgard was stringently against such a plan. They said your Realm is still too young to trade with."

"Did Odin know Loki would end up like this?" Clint asked with a slight incline of his head in the direction of Loki's room.

"He claimed not," Thor said. "But he said that the agreement he swore to promised no interference from Asgard." Thor reached up and rubbed his forehead. "Father said that he did not expect Shield to find anything that Loki could not recover from... given time."

"Do you believe that?" Natasha asked quietly.

Thor pushed his hair back from his face. "I don't know. If I did not see my Brother as he is now... I don't think I would have thought Shield could harm Loki either. And yet, if he was watching for Loki's well-being like he claims that he was, he should have seen things deteriorating and stepped in!"

"Wait a second here," Steve said, holding a hand up. "You're not going to get in trouble with him for saving your Brother or anything, right? I mean, because he swore Asgard wouldn't interfere?"

Thor shook his hand. "No, he ensured my actions would not be held against Asgard. I've never been skilled in Diplomacy... Loki was the one gifted in that area. I have ruined enough treaties in my time for my Father and Brother to put exemptions for me into all their agreements," Thor said. "I have my own personal accounts and properties to provide weregilds so that Asgard doesn't suffer. Not to say there are not still lines that I could cross if I make a large enough gaff, but it would take a particularly offensive situation."

"How many is 'enough' for them to preemptively exclude you from deals like that?" Tony asked.

Thor waved a hand. "A few dozen. The point remains that, unless stated otherwise, my actions are my own. Now, that does mean I often handle the fallout of my actions on my own as well, but that has rarely been a problem. On the whole, it only gets complicated when I... nearly start wars by needing Odin to come to Realms he has agreed to never set foot on again... like Jotunheim... but that assuredly doesn't apply here."

"Well, it's good you won't get in trouble," Bruce said. "But, if your actions are considered separate here... why didn't your Dad tell you Loki was in trouble and held by Shield?"

"That would constitute interfering, according to my Father," Thor said with a scowl. "I do not agree, but as he interprets it... to directly tell me when he knows that my actions would not break the treaty would break it anyway. At the very least, it would go against it in spirit and be dishonorable."

"So, instead, his solution was just to do nothing," Clint said. More and more, he disliked Thor's old man. He wasn't like Clint's abusive ass Father, it didn't seem like, but he wasn't a whole lot better either. It really made Clint want to do some cathartic violence or something.

"He said until the five years were over, his hands were tied..." Thor said. "He wouldn't send any healers either."

"But you said your mother was coming with one," Laura said.

Thor nodded. "Mother has ignored Father. To get around the treaty, she summoned a healer from another Realm, so Asgard is not personally helping anything. And... honestly, I think everyone agrees that it is mostly lip service than any actual concern with breaking the arrangement."

"So... to sum up, your Dad saw Loki getting tortured. Repeatedly. Did nothing. He watched him get worse and worse and still did nothing. All because he promised he wouldn't," Tony said. "... wow. Right up there with my old man and his whole 'doesn't negotiate with kidnappers' rule."

"Wait, Howard had a rule about kidnappers?" Steve asked.

"Well, yeah, I was sort of a target for them, Steve," Tony said. "Howard Stark: rich, powerful, and insanely public figure. His kid's gonna be sort of a number one person to try and use for leverage."

Steve went pink at the tone used. "Ah, I guess... I just never thought about it like that before..."

Tony shrugged. "No biggie and not really the point of this conversation. Odin knew his kid was being tortured and decided to do nothing about it because... I know it couldn't have been that he was scared of us, little old humans." 

Thor shook his head. "Like I said... it was more to show the other Realms that we paid yours retribution in some way. The Nine only truly operate together under Asgard if the other Realms know that they have at least some way of keeping Asgard accountable," Thor said. "I have... come to realize it is not exactly equal... but it is something. I suppose."

"Baby steps, then," Bruce said.

"... in a manner of speaking."

There were a few heartbeats of silence. "Here's a question, though," Natasha said. She glanced at all of them before her gaze settling on Thor. "In this agreement that Odin made, is he required to help Shield get Loki back?" she asked. Clint froze and mentally rejected that idea entirely. Shield wasn't going to get their hands on Loki again. No matter who helped them.

"Oh. Oh, that's not a fun idea at all," Tony said. 

Thor's face had gone somewhat slack. His eyes were wide with surprise. "I-I did not even think to ask something like that!"

"Even if he's supposed to help get Loki back, we won't let that happen," Steve said. "He's got no information to give them, and abusing a disabled person is just not right. Especially when the disabled person doesn't even seem to remember what it was that they did."

"That's right. Loki isn't going back to them," Laura said with a firmness that Clint was honestly a little surprised to hear. Clint had anticipated needing to reassure Laura about the whole situation as he knew that Laura had been apprehensive at first with the idea of Loki in their home. Hell, Clint had been too. But after caring for him for as long as they had, Clint supposed they'd both grown a little protective of him.

"Fury knows that we have Loki and that Thor specifically knows what's been going on," Bruce said in a deliberately even tone. "I don't think he'd be stupid enough to try and get Loki back unless he was sure he could do it without us becoming aware of it or not interfering for some reason."

"But would having Odin's backing give him that security?" Clint asked. "That's why we need to know what exactly Odin agreed to do or not do. Especially if he's going to stick to the letter of the agreement like he has been."

Thor slowly nodded. "I will ask Mother when she arrives. If anyone will know... it will be her. And if she does not know, she will find out. The shouting match between them when I was there was... most memorable. Father would not dare to hide things from her as the situation is currently," Thor said.

"Your Mother runs the show, huh?" Laura asked.

Thor frowned slightly. "Show?"

"She means that your Mother is really the one in control between your parents, Thor," Natasha clarified.

"Ah. One might say that," Thor said. "Though Father has more raw power than Mother... Mother has... quite the creativity at her disposal and has been known to get even in very surprising ways. Father -and all of Asgard really- has learned not to push her. Especially when she's already upset."

"It's good she's on our side, then," Bruce muttered.

"Verily," Thor said.

From the TV, they could hear Pepper whisper-shouting Tony's name. The genius cringed and looked over. "One sec, Pep. I also should not push already upset women, so I've got to go. I'm almost done here in Japan, I think I can sneak out of the rest of the presentations, so I'll be back soon." Before anyone could respond, the feed cut out, and the TV was left with just a blank white screen. 

"She's going to murder him one of these days," Bruce said dryly. "Just... one too many meetings ditched and then snap. Bye-bye, Iron Man..."

"I don't even think she'd get caught," Natasha offered. "She's pretty smart and resourceful."

"My friends," Thor said. "Again, I must thank you for all you have done for me and my Brother. I am... truly humbled."

Steve offered a smile. "No need for that. It's the right thing to do."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My favorite Steve is a Steve that can be a righteous boy scout without coming across as a hypocrite and/or insensitive/selfish. That's why I kind of hate Civil War... Not that there was anyone that acted super good at all times in that mind you...


End file.
